Cellar Door
by AmiraAlmighty
Summary: A thrilling first person POV story, seen through the rather odd eyes of Beyond Birthday. Beyond is your 'normal' guy next door, goes to school, has a career, a genius. But how does he fall? And who watches him do it?
1. First sight

I see her.

I want her.

She is my chosen one. It just seems too easy. I glanced over at the young college student waving her thumb throughout the air, hoping to catch someone's attention.

She caught mine.

I have to struggle to keep my composure as I slow down my silver Honda Accord. Window rolling down, she rests her hand on the door, "Hi there." She was terribly appetizing, especially since I knew what was going to happen to her, I was yearning with anticipation.

"Do you need help miss? A ride somewhere?" I gave her my friendly, charitable smile. I knew it was just too easy to win her over.

Women, they're all too similar.

"Well, I am in need of some help. I really just need a ride to the nearest town…or city…or civilization…" She smirked coolly trying to actually impress me. "I mean it's just there is nothing out here."

"Of course you can come along, anything for a sweet young lady." This would definitely be simple, she just looked so dense. I unlocked my door and she climbed in the immaculate passenger seat. I sped off and she buckled her life belt.

After a moment of silence the foolish girl turned towards me, clearly evaluating me, "You know, you don't have to call me 'young lady', I am twenty years old and I am currently back-packing around the U.S." Was she really trying to impress me with her spontaneity? What an idiot…as if I could ever fall for that.

I laughed warmly, "Okay then, no 'young lady'. What do you prefer to be called?"

"Christine, how about you friendly stranger?" She even had the audacity to lean towards me, exposing her fake-tanned cleavage and cheap lingerie. I looked at the street signs as we got off the exit to my workshop, counting how many cars passed by. "Well…," she insisted, "What's your name?"

I could feel my heart fluttering with adrenaline; I knew it was time to act. I reached into the compartment on the side of my door and held the small object between my fingers, gently placing it by the side of my leg unnoticeably. "My name?" I grabbed the needle, holding it firmly by my side, still inconspicuous. "My name is Beyond, Beyond Birthday." I waited for the giggles I knew would come as I fondled the needle between my fingers.

"Ha, that is such a…weird name? What kind of name is that?" She threw her head back in playful laughter then turned toward me, expecting an answer.

"It's the kind of name you will never forget." I slammed on my brakes sending helpless Christine forward, her life belt scratching her neck as it protested back. I acted quickly, piercing the side of her neck with the needle. I breathed in the sweetest air as I witnessed her face contort with pain and confusion, I almost wanted to cry I was so full of ecstasy.

I coveted her.

She came to me.

I gave her my blessing.

I drove off the main road onto my secluded path to the warehouse. I looked at the refined landscape surrounding me. The trees turned their most delicate shade of amber as the wind caressed their fallen children. It was truly alluring. But nothing could be as beautiful or as poetic as this girl's fate. I parked my car inside the garage and sealed off the door. I ran around to the other side of my car and picked up the bimbo. You know, she probably would be pretty if she didn't wear two bras and thick globs of make-up.

I like the warehouse, it was nice and cozy. It was simple; it consisted mostly of concrete with the occasional stain. I walked into the examining room and laid my specimen on the slab. This burning sensation wouldn't end until I had my way with her. I left her on the table and cuffed her wrists and ankles to the floor, she is not going anywhere. I walked into the next room which had a single stainless steel refrigerator that juxtaposed with the rather dirty cement walls. I grabbed a jar of strawberry jelly and started devouring it, my one obsession. The only thing in the world that was sweet to me. I sat on the edge of the slab; I knew she would be waking up soon. As I lapped up the jam escaping the edges of the glass jar I felt my mind slipping away as I stared off into space.

_Shlinggg._

I snapped out of my trance and Christine woke up. I turned away from her placing the jelly down, waiting it. Like clockwork, the screams pierced through the walls sending shivers of satisfaction down my vertebrae. I pivoted around and stalked closer to her as the pleading started, as to be expected.

"Stop! STOP! Wh-what are you doing? What the fuck! Don't you come near me!" She yelled the top of her apparently high pitched lungs.

So we have a screamer.

I wonder what her head would look like on a stick.

It is just something to consider…

I grabbed her jaw in between my hands and I looked into her mascara stained face, "Christine, I'm not doing this to _you_ as much as I am doing this for _me._" And I smiled honestly to try and console her; after all I'm not heartless.

I just know what I want.

Apparently she thought she was in control because the bitch actually had the nerve to spit on me. No matter, I let her soak in her glory for a brief moment. I clenched her jaw with a singular hand as the other wiped my face from her revolting slobber. It really pisses me off when people just don't cooperate.

I hate it.

She stimulated my need to slaughter her.

My hand still secured on her face clung to her skin as I tried to rip a bit of her face off, which was the least of her worries. I nail dug deep enough to break the skin as blood started flowing out.

Red paint on a tanned canvas.

It looks like jelly…

As my face neared the crook of her neck, I felt her salty tears fall on my cheek. As my tongue glazed over the hemoglobin my heart expedited, it tasted of iron and strawberries. I closed my eyes as the feeling flowed through all my nerves, a beautiful buzz. Christine squirmed in protest, trying to push me away. I tangled my hand into her greasy hair as I continued to consume the latest streams of fresh plasma. I pulled my head back at a tormenting slow pace as the girl desperately attempted to kick me. I walked into the singular, small bathroom to wash my hands. It was only when I glanced on the mirror I saw they blood dripping from my mouth, staining my neck, as it penetrated my white shirt. I saw a beautiful man in the mirror. A tall, pale, slender man stared back at me with ravenous crimson eyes. Fuck, he was exquisite.

As I went back to Christine, I continued to the far left corner of the room that had my box. I reached in and pulled out a box cutter, a weapon ideal for quick incisions or just opening a package as well. I pulled a chair next to the screamer and examined her before making a move. "Take of your clothes." She looked at me, her face scrunched up in confusion. How ugly.

"Did you not hear me?" She winced as she let her hands fall from her destroyed cheek to attempt and remove her clothes.

Not. Fast. Enough.

I smacked her hands away and peeled of her top layer of clothing for her. Oh how she struggled. It almost made me smile, her motivation, but it was pointless for her. This would end her chatter sure enough. I stretched out her top lip and started carving away.

Rip. Rip. Rip.

As to be expected, the screamer tried her hardest to slip away from my grasp as she screamed in ultimate pain. I ignored her idiotic pleads and continued scraping away at her lip that was now hanging off. Strawberry jam flowed out from her face, staining my hands as I worked. Once the top lip was completely detached I threw it on the floor. Any moment now I expect her to pass out from blood loss but she clung to her consciousness. I started picking at her bottom lip, when I saw her eyes dazing in and out of focus.

I washed my hands off in the deep basin and patted my hands dry on my worn out jeans. I headed back towards the room that contained Christine; it was uncharacteristically quiet. As I stepped over the threshold to her chamber, I grew hot with anger. Christine had bit her tongue off. The pink organ dangled by a thread. _Fucking bitch. _She ruined all of the fun.

I wanted to see the light leave her eyes.

Now all I see if a stiffened corpse. I walked over to my supply closet and brought out the bag. The bag contained all of my favorite weapons of choice, and for this occasion, I brought out the box cutter. Looking at her mangled face made me smile; I wanted her body to be in the same state. I started removing the rest her clothes quickly and swiftly. I couldn't help but laugh at her undergarments of choice. What the hell did she need lingerie for? She must be some kind of street walker. I delicately peeled off her weird, lacey corset thing and pulled off her underwear. I held the box cutter in my left hand as I skimmed the surface of her skin with my right looking for a good spot. I decided to start on her left hip bone. I made small incisions, carving a tattoo I really think she would appreciate.

PROPERTY OF BB.

Voila, her own customized tramp stamp. After amusing myself for a moment, I started to really get into my work drawing, carving, cleaving her skin. She was the perfect canvas for my artistic fix of the moment. After covering most of her torso, I decided to dig deeper. I went back to the bag and brought out the butcher knife. I started at the top of her sternum and gently traced down to the top of her pelvis. The lightest penetration made her blood rush out, spoiling my work. I traced over my first line again, this time with greater force precisely breaking the tough skin. My final lacerations were two small diagonal lines at the tips of the starting points, looking similar to arrows pointing in opposite directions. I folded the flaps of skin back and exposed her internal organs.

It was more breath taking than to ever be imagined.

Like a child at Christmas, I grabbed the first organ I could find and clutched it in my hand. It was warm and moist, like a water balloon filled with warm water but a thicker skin. This had to be the stomach. As I further examined, I saw all of her organs tangled with each other. I even examined her reproductive organs, which were incredibly small. Then I noticed something rather odd.

When I cut open her uterus, I discovered something peculiar. I stared in disbelief at the treasure once concealed in the tiny organ. There was a fetus in it; without a doubt deceased now from lack of oxygen. I paused, not completely understanding what exactly just happened. I had killed a mother and her unborn child.

I was truly exceptional.

I continued dissecting for hours when the alarm on my phone went off.

_Verdammt…_ It was time to retreat back to my conventional home. I sealed the bodies in a thick black body bag and stowed it on a hanger. I cleaned up the warehouse, pulled on a long black jacket to conceal my stained clothes, and sped off into the night.

About half an hour later I arrived in my middle class apartment complex. I climbed up four flights of stairs and opened door 804. I locked the door and flicked on the lights. I pulled off my jacket and the rest of my clothes as well; my boxers were all that remained. After walking aimlessly in and out of each room I ended up back in the kitchen.

Mmm…I really want some jelly.

I walked over to the identical stainless steel fridge that contained two things: strawberry jam, and Ramunè. I grabbed a jar of jam and sat at the table, my feet balancing me on the chair, sitting in a squatting like position and my hand grabbed globs of jelly.

I love jelly.


	2. Time for work

_Bringgg. Bringgg._

I woke up to the vibrations of my phone on my bedside table, as my morning alarm went off. _Time for work already? _I lay in bed for another moment as I stretched my tense limbs; I hadn't realized how sore I was. A smile formed on my face as a thought of yesterday's activities, and my heart accelerated with excitement. I slowly opened my mahogany eyes and observed the dust dancing around my room in the sunlight.

As I turned on the shower, I started thinking of the day to come. Work might actually be exciting; I mean the thrill of having a secret like this while everyone just smiles on? It's great. I suppose it is like when women's magazines tell their demographic to not wear underwear in ordinary places to make them feel more excited or sexy…or something like that. And yes, I do read women's magazines. It is very good for research. Besides all the lame tips they give them for talking to guys, I know what to expect from them.

They're all the same.

I stepped in the shower and let the intensely hot water scorch my skin. I relaxed my trapezius and latissumis dorsi; the water loosened the muscles as I lathered strawberry soap over myself.

After about five minutes, I stepped out of the shower and dried myself off.

I pulled on my black dress pants and long sleeved button up shirt. I looked like a poster child for a men's fashion magazine. I carefully buttoned up the soft light blue cotton shirt with matching navy blue tie; I was meticulous about looking exactly right.

Some might call this behavior OCD.

I call it, _initiative_.

If you want to portray yourself as something (especially something you are not), you have to look, breath, and act the part.

I walked into the kitchen and opened a new jar of strawberry jelly, annoyed by the fact I had to use a spoon as to not make myself dirty again. As I swept my tongue over the spoon, I scanned my brain for any important notices I may have forgotten. I glanced at the clock and decided to leave my apartment a little early. I wanted to look like I enjoyed my job.

As I pulled into the parking garage of the high-end technology firm, I remembered the meeting I had scheduled for the afternoon and almost beat my head on the steering wheel.

_They don't really need my opinion anyway…_

I shut my door as I started walking toward the elevator. Perks of working with a technology company? You get the most superior, top of line things. The cons? You can't blame the elevator for shutting just before a person sprinting to it gets within arm's reach.

"Akira! Hold on there buddy!"

Confession…

Obviously, I use an alias. To everyone I don't kill, I am known as Akira Javed, a twenty two year old technology genius. To them, I am friendly, smart, and conservative.

I know, I laughed too.

The tall woman with jet black hair looked down at me, "So Akira…How was the weekend? Did you ever go to that party?" She threw out a flirty smirk and looked at me through her thick rimmed glasses. She must be referring to that happy hour I got invited to…

I wrinkled my eye brows in frustration," Shoot, I must have forgotten. Oh well, drinking is not really my thing anyways." And that was the truth, alcohol tastes like pure gasoline.

_But homicide tastes like strawberries._

"What about you Amber? Did you enjoy yourself?" From that point on, I could not really tell you what I had listened to. I find that if you just let women talk and throw in the occasional 'Oohs' and 'Aahs' when necessary, they look more than pleased with themselves. But as she continued to talk and I pretended to listen, I examined her, wondering if I would ever desire to delete her. Then it occurred to me that that would require spending my precious time actually planning things for her.

Hell no. You may think that as a killer I do not care for my victims at all. Oh how it is quite the contrary! I do care about my chosen ones very, very much. After all, they are the vessels that make my dreams become reality. I would be nothing without them! Each one of my slayings is carefully constructed and executed. There is only _one_ thing spontaneous about it, and that is the selection of my victims. It is purely desire, no pattern and no method.

As the elevator released us onto our designated floor we parted our separate ways as I headed towards my office.

Usually, when I went inside my moderate sized office, it meant I wanted to work without interruption. But today when I sat at my mahogany desk, there was a small blue post-it note that read: Staff meeting today, 8:30. My eyes shot up to the large analog clock that hung on the south wall of my office and groaned. 8:25… Agitated, I stood up and started sauntering toward the conference room.

I sat in the last vacant chair and looked up toward Bill, the CEO of Barry-Sanders Technology Firm. He looked serious as he rubbed his eyes and placed his glasses back on his face.

"I have gathered all of you here today to discuss a rather unfortunate event. As all of you know, Todd, our associate to the FBI is a father of five children. It has been hypothesized that his youngest daughter has been kidnapped." I noticed his eyes dance around nervously as he spat out the news, "Now, you may be wondering why I am sharing this with you. The reason is simple, firstly, police speculate she was kidnapped in the Quantico area and secondly Mr. Scott has required me to announce this. He feels that the more people know the greater the chances are of him finding her."

You could tell he thought the second part was an irrational idea, and I almost wanted to smile seeing him evaluate things in his mind all wide eyed and confused.

"I will be sending an email out with her picture and information to all of you after you leave. I ask each and every one of you to please keep an extra eye out for suspicious behavior." He said a few more exceptionally ordinary things and dismissed us back to work.

Once again I sat at my desk and opened the laptop on my desk. As I looked through all of my emails, I quickly recognized the one regarding the previous meeting. I clicked it open and stared at the screen.

NAME: Christine Scott

AGE: 20 Y/O

I paused reading mid sentence. My eyes shot towards the door, checking to see if it was closed. Flames spread throughout my entire body as I grew hot with realization. I did not even need to read any further, the name and age was enough, and the picture completely gave it away.

_No fucking way_…

It took every ounce of energy I had to keep my composure.


	3. Bold people

It took every ounce of energy I had to keep my composure.

I wanted to dance around my office. I was finally getting the recognition I deserved! I wanted to cry out with delight. But not a hint of emotion passed my face.

Damn, I am omnipotent.

I closed the file and started answering much neglected emails, and filed through my desk.

"Hey man, sorry to intrude on you- I know how efficient you are when you close the door- but I got a huge favor to ask. And after I got you medicine that one time you were sick, I think you owe me bro."

I looked into the deep blue eyes of the young Australian man and sighed. He did do me a favor… Though I don't think he realized that when he got me the medicine I requested, I actually used it on my victims…oh well.

"Okay, sure. What do you need?"

He smiled with relief and propped a leg up on a nearby chair, using his hands while he explained, "So it really won't take you too long, I just need you to check my new project. See if it works, tell me what you think. I have to present it at a conference tonight and I really value your opinion."

I placed my hand on his shoulder, "Sure thing John. Let's go take a look."

John White was a twenty year old biotechnologist that had the credentials to start his own technology firm but was content with the leniency they gave him here to research and experiment. He was always full of energy, and at times acted a little immature, but I guess you could call us friends; very distant friends, at least on my side, but friends. Not like that incredibly annoying bitch Amber. God she was such a waste of life. John was tall with sandy blonde hair and golden skin; I guess he really did look like your typical Australian. He looked more like a surfer than a genius.

"Okay right in here Akira." He pushed a heavy steel door open, and pulled a large lens out of a black bag. "So I got this new camera that can totally sense body heat, well all kinds of heat, but specifically body heat. And I know you're thinkin', 'Well John we have already developed infrared cameras' but this is different. This baby can not only detect the body heat, it focuses on it and follows it, you can set up tons in a house or building, and it will know when to record _and_ follow it. So if you're moving around, the lens will follow you and when you go into another room it'll pick up your heat almost instantaneously and start recording. And you'll see everything in normal colors, not like through the infrared lights. I mean I know it's a long shot but what do you think?"

"Wow John, I am not even sure what to say! This looks incredible; I mean to have this kind of surveillance…"

Well this will make my job a _hell_ of a lot harder…but more enjoyable at the same time, my recordings of the deaths will be more 'hands free'. This could come in handy.

I looked up at him and smiled reassuringly, "I am sure the staff will approve, maybe you should just work on the size, it is a little too big, you know?"

_Make it easier for me to hide…_

"Okay great. Thanks a lot Akira, you have no idea!!"

What a silly child, he is always so damn happy.

I started walking up to my office where I really hope no one else would disturb me. Believe it or not I actually enjoy my job…at times. It gives me a dose of normalcy when I find necessary and I really am interested in technology.

The rest of my day consisted of normal work things: filling out permits, approving ideas, managing a bunch of other things of mild importance. The usual.

_Bringgg._

My phone alarm went off, screaming at me to get out of the office. 18:30? Time to go! I locked up my office and walked towards the elevator, giving people passing by the occasional nod or smile. In the elevator I tapped my foot in anticipation; I had to get other previous engagements.

I peeled out of the parking garage and sped onto the busy freeway. It didn't take too much time to reach the community college. I already have my masters in Science Technologies but I am a man of many interests and often take many night classes purely for my own enjoyment. I might even get to see _her_.

Alexandria.

She was a truly fascinating creature. As I said before, I really am not a fan of women.

They're all the same.

But this woman, she was on a whole different level. I could actually have intelligent conversation with her, which was rare. And she was not distracted by my handsome appearance, let us not fool ourselves, I was a very good looking man. But there was something about her that actually made me want to talk to her. Every other girl, no person, they all are so similar, wearing their heart on their sleeve. Stupid. She was so reserved, making it very difficult to read her.

I like challenges.

I pulled into the parking lot and stepped out of the silver car. I looked out towards the forest painted orange as twilight consumed the atmosphere, complementing the dying trees perfectly. Pacing up to the building I looked around at the undergraduates.

It was so funny how they would never amount to anything. Not like me, I am already starting to get recognized. No, they would amount to _nothing_.

I walked into the small classroom of the art class and noticed I was a bit early.

There she is…

Nonchalantly I set up my things next to hers as she looked up at me and smiled.

I was almost surprised when she started talking to me.

_Almost_.

"Hi there," she looked into my eyes as she spoke, innocence consuming her face. I was too concerned with looking at her, I didn't notice my abnormal silence but the unique girl shrugged it off. "I know we have been in this class for three weeks now but you know I haven't got around to learning your name. But I believe it starts with an 'A', right?"

"Oh yeah, it's Akira Javed."

"Oh that is so elegant. Very regal name, I like it. Unique too…where are your parents from?"

"My parents?" The word almost sounded foreign to me, "Uh, well I was an orphan as long as I can remember, oh don't worry it is okay. It really doesn't bother me." I tried making her feel less awkward as she apologized. And it was the truth, in fact, I like not having parents. I find it liberating. "I'm sorry but I seem to have forgotten your name miss…"

Oh what a lie Alexandria.

"It's Alexandria."

Damn it, she looked so _soft_. She had porcelain skin and sleek black hair; a lot of her features were like…mine. Except she had deep, dark blue eyes. Still, I got this reserved vibe from her. God damn it, it is like she knows something I do not!

_C'est incroyable_.

Oh well, I know one day I will plan something special for this one.

The class only lasted an hour and a half, and it was a nice escape. I painting looked like a cluster fuck of reds and pinks, like a mangled candy cane.

It looks like jelly…

I started packing my things up and saw a shadow emerge in front of me.

"I would really like to talk to you more. So, if you're free give me a call." Alexandria handed me the slip of paper so certainly it was definitely not just a booty call number. Hah, was she serious? I find it amazing that she found something compelling about me. But this is perfect; my plan will be put in motion soon! Alexandria you will never forget Beyond Birthday.

I sped off into the crisp night towards the sketchier part of the neighborhood. I pulled into the parking lot of a sex shop I was familiar with and walked inside briskly to avoid the fresh drizzles of rain. The soft precipitation tickled my thick eyelashes as I hopped in and wiped my face.

"Welcome, let me know if you need anything or have any questions," the only employee said as I came in. Her eyes lingered on me a second too long for me to ignore.

She kind of pissed me off.

I pretended to look around as she walked back up to me, "You lookin' for anything in particular mister?" She was short with vibrant red hair; I think it was natural too, very pretty. She had dark brown eyes and a small freckled face. Her name tag read 'Aphrodite' making me laugh.

"Is that your real name?"

"Oh, no. Heh, they give us names. My real name is Sam actually."

I looked back towards the shelves of DVDs as she continued to stare at me. What does she want? Actually the answer is quite simple she wants me of course, I mean she is pretty but she is dressed kind of slutty, nothing like that whore Christine, but she does have a lot of tattoos and piercings. Things could turn out in my favor though…this could be fun. I turned back towards her looking friendly as ever, "Uhm, you've been staring at me for the past two minutes…" I tried to sound nervous when I laughed. I am pretty sure she was already enticed; I practice my laughs all the time.

"Oh oh I am sorry. It is just; you are very…attractive…" She bit her lip as she continued to evaluate me, and I began walking away towards the other side of the store, amused as she followed like a puppy. "Listen, my shift ends right about now…" She looked up at me with hopeful eyes.

Damn she was **bold**.

I thought of the most cliché thing I could think of and raised one finger to her mouth and she trailed off.

"Whatever you want Sam." Ahhh, girls love this kind of thing. I, however, have other intentions. She grabbed my hand and let me out towards the back way of the small building. Why the fuck was she in control!? As soon as we rounded the corner, I made sure to change that immediately. I pinned her shoulders on the wall and crushed my lips onto her, the rain pouring down. Her, being an over excited (and if I had to guess) eighteen year old girl, she threw herself at me, shoving her tongue down my throat.

Ew.

Does no one have class anymore? Because I am pretty sure this bitch doesn't even know my name. She continued to deepen the kiss by tangling her fingers in my mop of think onyx hair. If I had any doubt about tongue rings before, I now knew…they were hot. I pulled away from the tight embrace, partly to lead her away, and partly to breath.

"Come with me Samantha?" Her face lit up like Christmas, as she followed me in the rain to my car and without a second thought, jumped into the passenger seat.

I sped, really sped down the freeway back to the warehouse. This was going to have to be quick. I stepped out of the car and ran to her side to open the door as a said, "My name is Beyond Birthday by the way. Just so you know what you'll be screaming later." I winked at her and wrapped my arm around her waist.

Ew, gross. Like I would actually think about sleeping with her? Oh hell no.

"Haha, okay then Beyond…where are we going now?" She leant forward playfully as she leant her head on my deltoid.

"My chamber." Well, at least I didn't have to lie with this one. It was so obvious she was totally into the sadomasochist thing; of course telling her about my chamber would only excite her more. I led her into the chamber and she quickly found her place.

Good girl.

She lay down on the slab and turned to look at me. Her heavy makeup actually did look really nice on her, much nicer than Christine. So she was totally into the sado thing? I could adapt no problem. I am quite the fan myself. I stood behind the table and harshly hooked her arms into the handcuffs. She wriggled in minor pain, I could she heart beating faster. I walked to the opposing end and tied her legs down. She looked up at me with devilish eyes, excited for what she assumes will come. I tugged on one of the chains for support as I climbed onto the table, causing it to pinch her skin. She gasped in pain…well I guess it was pleasure for her. I kneeled down on top of her, my legs on either side of her, I was in total control.

"What are you going to do to me?" She was practically begging, no no no! It is not good to beg slut!

I leaned in next her ear and she tried to press her body towards me, "I am going to the best I can." Once again I crashed my lips onto hers, thoroughly distracting her. As if in a movie, my left arm slowly rose with the gleaming silver pick axe. I could just see it in my mind, the protests of the audience as we both knew her fate, clear as day but she is simply too seduced. At the peak of the axe's path I threw it forward with all of my strength. It pinned her upper arm to the slab as she wailed in pleasure. Maybe it was just too much pleasure because she didn't look so happy…oh well. Her eyes widened as she saw they streams of blood spurting from her arm. I brushed the axe across her jugular causing her to gargle on her own blood. She twitched in pain, I am pretty sure she is having a seizure… Within a matter of three minutes she stopped moving. I crouched over her dead body and leaned into her face once more.

"I did my best slut," I whispered to her as I licked slowly, one singular movement up her jaw line. I moved my mouth to her bleeding arm sucking greedily before the blood coagulated.

It _tastes_ like jelly…


	4. Mother

Driving home, I felt…alone. I never feel alone, why would this veil of loneliness cover me now? I guess even perfect people like me have their down moments. I stroked the leather steering wheel with my thumbs as my vision blurred.

The blood curdling screams filled the silence as I watched the child run for his life. "Help me! Please! Anybody!" the little boy begged for aid that I knew would never come. The small boy, with a hug mop of black hair looked around for any means of escape in the small alley. He jerked around and pounded his dirty fists on the old brick walls as his attacker came, full speed behind him. The small boy's large eyes overflowed with salty tears that flowed down his dirty face. The large, dark bags under his eyes making him more like a ghost than a person. He clawed at the building as he felt the presence of his attacker behind him.

"Darling, why are you running away from me?" the tall equally, if not more, dirty woman said. "I am your mother, you need to obey and listen to me." She looked around the abandoned alley for any witnesses as she dug her nails into the little boys shoulder. "Let's go, _right now,"_ she practically spit out the last two words. The boy began to protest, but his objections were quickly muffled as the mother shoved her shirt in his mouth. The sickly skinny child kicked her shin and bit down on her forearm. "You little shit…" In a matter of seconds, the mother back handed the little boy, blood leaking out of his mouth in a single stream. She continued to pull his greasy black hair as a small rain storm began.

"Mommy…Please…I don't want to…"

"Shut the fuck up you little mistake, you do whatever I say!"

I continued watching as the mother pushed her little boy on the ground in puddles contaminated with filth. The boy put his hands in front of his face, defensively as the mother threw her head back producing an evil snicker. The rain poured down even harder, mixing with the boys tears. The attacker bent down ripping down his pants and boxers with obvious practice, then pulling down her own undergarments. As she neared to straddle the boy, he screamed with refusal.

"Mom…NO! STOP! S-stop…I'm only a little kid…" he burst into loud sobs; he appeared to be around the age of six or seven. _So young…_

The mother screamed in frustration and continued on with the rape.

Minutes later, the mother pulled her clothes back on and without a second glance continued out towards the street, leaving behind the curled up mass that was her son, on the ground. I watched as the little boy lay limp on the dirty, wet cement. He stared off lifelessly as the abuser walked away. After several moments, the little boy clenched his fists and screamed towards the sky. His shirt turning pink from the mixture of blood and rain was ripped to shreds, exposing his scared, thin chest. He stood up carefully, and turned around to face the path to the street when a gleaming object caught his eye. He crouched next to the turned over trash can and picked up his treasure…a cutting knife? The child hugged it as if he just received a gift from Santa Claus. "Merci, mon dieu Kira, Je ne vous laisserai pas tomber…" he whispered as he looked towards the gray sky.

BEEEEEEEP.

I saw bright headlights coming in my direction as I quickly swerved off the road.

"Watch where you're going fucker!" The angry driver flew past me, flicking me off, rightfully so I suppose.

I sat in my car for another moment, trembling as I unfastened my life belt. My knees gravitated towards my chest as I clung to them and cradled myself back and forth. I tried with all of my power to hug that little boy inside of me. I opened the door and stepped out into the night, looking at the dark sky above my head. The rain fell down softly, like the gods were crying with me. Walking towards the back of the car, I tripped over a muddy root in the ground. Instinctively, I held my arms out in front of me to catch my fall. The small rocks cut into the palms of my hand; I knelt on the ground gripping the grass around me as visions of my childhood consumed my brain. I silent sobs soon ceased as I looked toward the starry night. I stood up and did my best to brush the dirt off of my clothes but they were already stained with the blood from my hands. I hadn't noticed the nearing headlights as I turned around to get back into my car.

An unfamiliar voice spoke as it held a flashlight in my face, "Sir? Are you okay there?" Obviously noticing the blood on my hands, I saw him frantically grope around for the butt of his gun. "Is there something you need to tell me?" The overweight officer examined me with the flashlight, one I designed might I add, trying to assert his dominance. I could practically smell the nervousness coming off of him, as his lips trembled.

"I am so sorry officer, there seems to be a bit of a misunderstanding. My car hydroplaned and swerved me off the road. When I got out of my car to check my tires and everything, I had tripped, which explains the cuts and dirt on me. I know I must look sketchy but honestly, I am just in a bad situation and would like to get home."

The police officer looked at me for just another moment when I saw the look, I knew he was giving in. "Oh sure thing son, I'll let you be on your way but, as you may have heard, there is a kidnapper at large. I wouldn't be surprised if this psycho was a murderer too. Just watch yourself okay?"

I smiled back reassuringly, suppressing a laugh, "Sure thing sir."

I turned to open my car when he said, "Just one more thing…"

Annoyed, I looked up keeping my patience, "Sir?"

"I need your name." He shuffled through his jacket and pulled out a note pad and pen while he fumbled with his flashlight.

Once he got situated his eyes looked up at me, "Name please?"

"Oh. Oh yeah, its Javed. Akira Javed."

He clicked his pen shut and put the tools back into his jacket patting his pocket, "Thanks son. You drive careful now."

Once again, I got into my car and looked forward to getting home.

When I reached my apartment I opened the door and ran towards the bathroom turning the tub on. As it warmed up I went back into the kitchen bringing out two jars of jelly, eating them doubly fast. I walked back into the bath room and sat down on the toilet, waiting for the water to heat, as I rested my head a top my fists.

_What made me think…of that…after all of these years…_

I stood and peeled my clothes off, revealing my white body. Before getting in the old marble tub, I crouched down, opening a cabinet under the sink. I pulled out a small tin chocolate box and took out an item better than chocolate. I twirled the small razor between my fingers as I stepped toward the tub.

I felt the familiar cocoon of warmth penetrate my skin as I dipped into the tub, dunking my head in. Pushing my hair out of my face, I gazed at the razor and routinely stretched out some skin on my chest as I swiftly struck it.

Strike. Strike. You're out…

The tiny incisions took my world away, filling my head my symphonies of angels singing. I sat in the tub for a few more minutes then stood to turn on the shower and remove the plug. I squirted the strawberry shampoo into my hand and began to lather my mop of hair. Next, I rubbed the bar of soap between my palms and spread it all over myself, stinging the fresh lacerations. As I massaged my head, I began humming an original tune. The vibrations of my vocals chords tickling my throat. I thought of him.

Asher.

The only person I had ever loved. Why did he leave me? Where did he go?

My stomach flipped as I thought about our relationship. The dates, the conversations, the contact…

A small moan escaped my mouth as I thought of my love and how much I had missed him.

Where did he go??


	5. Asher

_Drip, drip, drip._

I turned the faucet of the shower off and pushed the curtain open. I stepped out, not even bothering to grab a towel as I stood, dripping in the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror. I watched the thin streams of scarlet travel down my torso. Letters were carved along my chest spelling out 'forever'.

**Forever.**

My work would live forever.

My name would live forever.

I would live forever.

Forever and **beyond**.

I stalked up to the full length mirror, standing only centimeters away as I stared at my own blood colored eyes. I raised my left hand and watched in the mirror as it scooped up fresh streams of jelly. As my hand neared my mouth, I closed my eyes as the plasma took over my senses. My head spun with excitement as my fingers trembled. I stood in a trance, only coming back to the real world when drops of water left my hair and landed on my stomach. I suppose I should get dressed now…

I grabbed the nearest towel and ruffled it through my hair, then continued patting the rest of myself dry. I pulled on boxers and flicked the bathroom light off.

The apartment was completely black, only the moonlight revealed the path to my bed. I hopped onto the oversized bed and snuggled underneath its delicate covers. I buried my face into the red pillow, it smelled fresh and clean. The texture massaged my face and tickled my eyelashes. I lay on my side as I stared out of the large window, the moonlight bathing the bed.

It has been so long since I have had sex. I suppose I could have got that freaky girl Sam to sleep with me, but…no I can't sleep with my victims…

But I would not mind _Alexandria…_

I practically purred at the mere thought of her name, there was something so different about her, I could just tell. Maybe I would call her; I sense something interesting about this one. As I continued thinking of her my thoughts eventually returned to him.

"Are you okay?" a tall male said to me with genuine concern. I could feel him staring at me as I clenched the sink in the public restroom, sobbing as I yelled in unrecognizable languages.

"Leave me the _fuck_ alone…" I looked up expecting to shout more profanities at the man but was instead forced backwards by a fist. "What the fuck are you doing?! Are you crazy leave me alone!"

The tall black haired man continued to punch me, my face and abdomen contorted with pain. I pressed my hands to the ground and swung my legs out, kicking him in his face. The brawl continued for what felt like hours, in reality only lasting a few minutes, until he finally raised his arms in surrender.

"Alright, I give up. You obviously are a fighter."

I raked my brain, wondering why this fight had even started, "So, why did you bother me?"

His eyes narrowed in disappointment, as if the answer was spelled out before me, "You were crying…no one as beautiful as you should cry…" The back of his hand wiped the tears off my pale cheek.

Who gave this asshole permission to _touch_ me? "Hey hey, what the hell do you think you are do-" My speech was cut off as the tall man grabbed my hair and pressed his lips onto mine. Instinctively, I wanted to struggle- and did at first- but the larger man pinned my arms to the wall as he dominated the embrace. The kisses were, sweet. At least, I think they were…they were nothing like _their_ kisses…

I looked up into the bright blue eyes of the big man as a light shade of strawberry spread across my face.

"It's Asher, by the way."

It took me a moment to remember how to breathe when I spit out a jumbled, "BeyondBirthday…"

"Beyond Birthday? And when is your birthday?" He tilted his head with interest as he lead me out of the restroom and back into the book store.

"It is the thirty first of October." Why was I telling him all of this?

He paused in his tracks for a moment, and then swiftly continued, "Tomorrow, right?"

My large red orbs people call eyes, widely stared and nodded at him. I was acting so foolish…

As we continued to walk through the aisles, I learned that he was a nineteen year old student who lived in the dormitories at the university he attended.

"Do you go to university yet?"

"Oh…Uhm, no. I am only seventeen; I'm still in high school."

As we neared the entrance of the store, he turned toward me, "I would like to see you again Beyond. If you don't mind, that is." My face must have light up like a Christmas tree, "Tomorrow?" he suggested. "For your birthday?"

"Really?"

"Sure. We'll do whatever you want. I think you deserve that much. You look like you've been through something terrible…I'd like to get to know you Beyond."

"Okay then…tomorrow. Same time and place?"

Asher nodded approvingly and waved good bye as he walked towards the parking garage.

I smiled as I walked back towards the criminal infested street that is my home. I ran through the alleys quickly trying to get home before the moon dominated the sky. My smile diminished as I neared the entrance of the dilapidated building. I could already hear the slurred yelling of my parents.

_I could always sleep on the fire escape again…_

I quickly decided against that as I looked down at the scars on my arm that was a result of it. I took a deep breath as I reached out for the cold steel handle.

_Click, click._

Please don't notice me, please don't notice me…

"Hey!"

_Shit._

"Hey, what the fuck are you doing? You were s-supposed to b-be here a looong time ago…" My father tried hard to spit out the words; I swear I almost saw him break a sweat out of it. I looked around to see my mother passed out on the couch, a needle still attached to her arm.

I tried ignoring him, hoping he was drunk enough not to follow me to my tiny room. I was about to cross over the threshold when I felt a sweaty hand grab my arm, "Oh nooo you don'" his eyes spun in circles as he tried to focus on me. "You're coming with me my little fuck toy."

I suppressed a scream as he dragged me toward his room.  
_Mon dieu Kira, aide-moi…_

As the tears swelled in my eyes, I turned all of my attention to think about my day with Asher tomorrow.

My father threw me on the floor and slammed the door.

_Asher, help me…_

"Asher…help me…" I pushed my face back into the pillow to muffle the sporadic sobs escaping my throat.

I stared off into the cruel moonlight, until I eventually fell asleep.


	6. Alexandria

You know what I love about the weekends? They're easy, laid back, simple. And they were much needed after a long week of work.

I sat at the kitchen table, my feet balancing me on my chair as I hunched my body towards my knees. It was a usual Saturday morning; I had my strawberry jelly and newspaper in front of me and my cell phone to the far left of the table.

"'The search continues for Christine Scott.', '…police are calling this an unavoidable tragedy…', '…she was traveling alone, was this really a kidnapping or a plan to run away?' "

_Mon dieu_, they are stupid. I wonder if they would ever notice that the red head is gone too… Although I am sure she is notorious for being missing a few days due to alcohol or substance abuse.

I completely cleaned out the glass jar of my jelly and sat with my hands behind my head, relaxing.

_Today will be a good day…_

I sat back up and reached towards my mobile, picking it up with my thumb and pointer fingers. I scrolled down my contacts list, and clicked the green call button. I glanced at the analog clock, 11:42, should be a good time.

_Bringggg. Bringgggg._

I got up and walked around the kitchen as the call tone continued.

_Briii- "Hello?"_

"Yes, Alexandria, this is your classmate Akira, is this a bad time?"

I heard her shifting the phone between her hands, as she shut what sounded like a car door.

"_Oh, no, it is perfect timing actually, I just got finished taking care of some things. What's up?"_

"Well, I was actually just wondering if you would like to go out with me today." I closed my eyes waiting for her response, she shouldn't be too surprised, I mean she did give me her number right?

"_Really? I would like that. Why don't you meet me at this restaurant I was going to anyways, then from there we can decide what we want to do. Is that okay?"_

Her decisiveness surprised me; she really was a woman who knew what she wanted. "Sure thing. Just text me the address, and I will be on my way _Alexandria_." I covered my mouth at the unexpected annunciation of her name; I hope she didn't notice anything.

Mentally kicking myself, she chuckled, _"I look forward to meeting with you Akira. See you soon."_

_Click._

I pushed the red button on my phone and placed it back on the table. This day will be interesting.

I walked up to the entrance of the restaurant, the sun unusually bright today, warming my face. The waiter glanced up as I neared to podium. I was about to speak when Alexandria jumped up from a table under an umbrella and waved me over.

The bitter wind juxtaposed with the baking sun, warming my neck as I neared to small table.

She hugged me as if we were old childhood friends, smiling warmly. Why is she so happy to see me?

I sat down at the black table-clothed booth as she finished mumbling something to the waiter. Was she ordering for me? Do we have another bold girl?

Don't disappoint me Alexandria…

"I don't even know where to begin, except, how come we've never socialized outside of class?" she tilted her head to the side.

"Well, I guess I was too distracted with my work—not that I am any good, I just find it as…a great escape."

"Me too…"

"Is art not your major?"

She giggled as the wind waltzed with her hair, blowing it in her face. "No actually, I am a psychology major. I use it as my way of meditation too. You can't break any rules in art, you know?"

She smiled, almost with a hint of sadness, as she grazed the perimeter of her water glass with her finger.

"A psychology major? How brave."

Alexandria's eyebrows scrunched up in confusion, "Brave? Why would you say that?"

"Oh, nothing. It's just…I don't think _I_ could ever handle that profession. I mean there are some sick people out there…" I could feel my stomach flipping as memories flicked through my head like an old black and white movie.

"You're telling me? Believe me; I evaluate profiles on the freaks—no more like _masterminds_, everyday!"

I leaned back effortlessly, placing my arms behind my head as my face wrinkled up to her, "Are you insinuating that you find these people…" I turned one hand over gesturing for her to continue.

"Oh, my I can see were that sounded odd. Okay, well all I meant was, the patterns and rituals, the way they think…it _is _incredible. Although, let me get one thing clear, what they do is completely wrong. The way they go about doing it is really all I find fascinating."

"I suppose I could agree with you. They way they do things and yet, they seem like the friendly neighbor next door."

"Exactly! Incredible…" She stared off into the distance, if only she knew the superlative man before her was _more_ than incredible. She chuckled, her blue eyes radiating against her pale skin, "Enough about these monsters, what is your major?"

I explained my schooling, my career, my "normal" life. She nodded approvingly, clearly impressed with my credentials; but then again, who wouldn't be?

The waiter walked up trying to balance to large trays on a huge platter. So, she did order for me.

Brave.

I smiled friendly, "What is all of this about?"

She winked, "Just be patient Akira, I ordered us my favorite dish." She kept her eyes locked on mine; waiting for my reaction and the waiter lifted the tops of the trays off.

Fuck, this girl is awesome.

My eyes instantly closed as the fumes of the strawberry cake rose into my nasal way. I almost jumped at the sound of her voice, "So…? Do you like it? I never really liked real food anyways; I always got in trouble with my parents for skipping to dessert."

"Wow, this is perfect actually. Strawberries…are my favorite."

_I fucking love strawberries._

"Good."

After lunch, we walked around the surrounding plaza, telling each other about ourselves. In all honesty, she did seem like a smart, goal-driven girl. It is a shame that I have to kill her.

A long pause came in our conversation as we neared the parking lot; I looked down at her usually loquacious self.

"Are you alright, Alexandria?"

She shook her head, as if trying to erase a thought.

"Come on, just say it."

She sighed and stopped in her tracks, "I know it is _none_ of my business, but I was wondering…What happened to your parents?"

Beyond Birthday grew hot with anger. Who does she think she is? However, Akira kept his composure and laughed it off. "Curious are we?"

"It just—it seems like your being orphaned, I can't place it but…uhm, how were you orphaned exactly?"

I chuckled lightly again. "It is getting pretty late…I'll walk you to your car. I think I'll save that story for another time."

Her eyes hinted at dissatisfaction, but she smiled, she must realize this was as far as I would go.

We walked up to her…motorcycle?

This one ceases to amaze me…

"Nice ride. You don't really look like the type though."

She walked up to me slowly, her own sleek black hair only inches from my chin as she looked up at me, "Well, I hope that is a good thing." She stepped back, and smiled once more before putting on her black helmet.

Home, sweet home.

I threw my keys on the kitchen table, and walked towards the fridge pulling out a bottle of Ramunè.

'_What happened to your parents…?'_

Finishing the last gulps of the carbonated drink, I got up and headed for my closet. I reached up to the far left corner of the walk in clothing chamber and pulled out a large container.

_This should take care of things for a while…_

I pulled out a thick leather strap and wrapped it around my thigh, dropping my pants to the floor, the spikes on the interior poking in.

_You were a mistake._

I pulled the end of the strap harder, the spikes making their first penetration.

_Hey, come and play fuck toy…_

I secured the leather strap once more, the nails digging deeper. Fresh hemoglobin flowing down my leg, as the limb began to grow numb with lack of circulation.

_I don't love you Beyond, just go._

I heaved with a mix of emotions as my red eyes glistened, pain and pleasure fusing together, the deadliest cocktail in the world.

My hand fell limp and let go of the strap, expecting it to fall, I was surprised when I found it so lodged into my thigh. Prying it out, I stroked the blood with my hand, rubbing it between my fingers. I walked up to the white wall of my bedroom and raised my arm towards it. I painted long distinct strokes on the wall with my own blood, stepping away to observe my art.

A giant 'L' was plastered on the wall.

_Mon frère…Où-es-tu?_


	7. Departure

_The small raven haired boy crawled out of the apartment, and took off running into the night. Sweat trickled down his back, mixing with the never ending showers of rain. Sharply, he turned a corner into a nearby alley and crouched on the ground. His chest was heaving; muffled whimpers escaped his throat as he squeezed his eyelids shut. _

_He slowly lifted his heavy lids, exposing his crimson eyes. His left hand carefully let go of its tight grasp, revealing the blood stained cutting knife. The corners of his mouth twitched up into a smile as his tears disappeared. Soft chuckles came out of his mouth, gradually crescendo into hysterical laughter. He dropped the knife and yanked at his hair._

_I did it…I am free… _

"_B! B? Where the hell did you go! I'm not done with you!"_

_The teenage boy only threw his head back in further laughter, as an almost identical copy ran towards him. The approaching boy looked like a clone of the hysterical teenager. The same ruffled black hair, white skin, thin frame, and bad posture. Except for one thing; this one had large onyx eyes._

"_What the FUCK DID YOU DO!?" he ran up to the overjoyed teen, grabbing his shoulders, shaking his body. _

_The red-eyed boy shut his mouth and pulled his head back up to face his twin, his face now serious and guarded._

"_B! Tell me…now." _

_The teenager again, broke into fits of laughter, aggravating the other. _

"_You incorrigible fuck…" he wound his left fist back and hit the other in the jaw._

"_Heh-heh. I'll…I'll tell you okay…" he slurped up the blood dripping down his chin. "We're free now Lawliet. No more mommy or daddy—"_

"…_what? You…killed them?" The onyx-eyed boy loosened his grip on his twin's shoulders, and instead pulled him into his chest, as he laid his head on his brother's shoulder, wide-eyed. _

"_Lawliet…I did it for _us_, to protect us…" The red-eyed boy smiled and he hugged his brother two minutes his younger._

"_No, no, NO! Why did you do that?! This is not the way to do things! We were almost eighteen anyways, we could have left!" The younger twin continued yelling and screaming, beating his brother's back with his fists._

"_Don't worry Lawli-pop…they didn't scream too much." _

Smack!

"_You sick fuck—" The younger began, onyx eyes glaring._

"_I'm the sick fuck? They didn't scream nearly as much as we did all those years, so tell me the justice in that! I should have killed them slowly like I wanted to but I didn't want to upset you, don't you dare try and tell me that what I did was wrong." He pushed his brother off of him, the onyx-eyed boy falling to the ground. _

_The rain filled the silence in the alley as the boys continued to stare at each other. _

_The older boy broke the hiatus in conversation, "What are we going to do Lawliet?"_

_The younger slowly picked him-self off the ground, clothes completely saturated with rain, his head the last thing that rose. "Not this time Beyond…"_

"_What are you talking about?"_

"_I'm not coming with you…this is good bye." _

_The older brother almost gasped when unexpected tears stung the corners of his eyes, he was thankful the rain blended with them. "You can't leave me…you don't have anywhere to go, you _need _me! We need each other!" _

"_Good-bye, B."_

I jumped up in my bed, my hair and clothes drenched with sweat, my lights still on.

_Shit, I must have passed out…_

I glanced over at my box and got up to stash it back into my closet. Damn, my leg was numb. I removed the rest of my sweat soaked clothes and threw them into the laundry basket, then continued into the kitchen to get a wash cloth. I heated the water in the faucet to a scolding temperature and let the rag absorb the liquid. I rung it out then pressed it to my thigh.

Damn how it burns, no this is good, I have to clean it. I continued scrubbing the blood that had crusted down the length of my leg until it only left a strawberry-colored stain.

I went around the apartment, shutting off each light before going back into my bedroom. I pulled on a clean pair off boxers and slipped into the bed, unconcerned with the ever growing stain on the linens.

_I'll have to buy more tomorrow…_

I hugged my legs to my chest and rocked back and forth.

_You little shit L, you left me. You…No, this needs to stop._

I felt the tickles in the back of my throat as I chuckled into my knees, L would be in my life again one day. Just like…_Asher. _I was still confused as to why L despised, no _loathed _Asher. Did Lawliet not understand our love? I always recalled trying my best to save my clone from the endless hours of torture when I escaped with Asher. But he always refused…no matter.

I clicked the lamp light off and drifted into a deep, dream-free sleep.


	8. Will you be my Valentine?

Ah, the Sabbath Day. I should do something special today. I slowly sat up, as to not abuse my healing leg. Getting up and out of bed, I grabbed the stained sheets and stuffed the contaminated linens into my washing machine. Pouring in the soap and pressing the necessary buttons, I walked back to my room.

I think a shower is in order…no distractions; I am starting to get sloppy. This_ will_ stop. Routinely, I pulled of my remaining plasma stained clothes and tossed them into the laundry basket. Most people, meaning I am exempt from this, must believe or perceive my paleness as sickly or undesirable but I love it. I love when the sea of red gently trickles down the soft, smooth snow until it saturates and stains it. I walked up to the familiar full-length mirror and looked at myself directly in the eyes. Large scarlet optics stared back at me, adrenaline and anticipation filling the usually lifeless pools. They flicked down to my lips: scarred, blood-stained, and lonely. The sensitive skin that longed for affectionate rather than the insolent behavior they were so used to receiving. The ruby eyes continued to trail down my torso, the thin white scars intersecting and complimenting each other. Hundreds of slashes, producing patterns and pictures that would make a zebra or cheetah consider themselves clean of marks. Some of the wounds did not appear to be the result of the blade, but rather from the human mouth.

"_You don't like my love bites?"_

A single droplet escaped my blurring eyes, landing on my feeble leg. I quickly shook my head, my black hair landing in my eyes.

_Enough._

I turned on the shower and promptly showered and dried myself, pulling on clean boxers, and then returning to the bathroom. I laid my towel out in front of the mirror on the moist tile floor. I crouched down to the cabinets underneath the sink and pulled out a large black nylon bag. I crawled, spider-like back to the towel and sat, in my signature crouching pose, unzipping the lumpy bag. I held it upside down, the contents pouring out. There was enough makeup in that bag to make any teenage girl jealous. My left hand rummaged through the large pile as my right hand gently tapped my knee.

Here we go.

I opened the compact that had face powder at least three shades darker than my own. Pushing my hair out of my face, I carefully stroked the makeup on my face, delicately like an artist. Immediately my face looked foreign. Meticulously, I spread it down my entire neck, my ears, careful around my hair line, my eye lids, everything. I looked so…ordinary.

I carefully applied the necessary amounts of eye shadows and other concealers as I transformed my appearance.

Next I grabbed a thin white and blue box and pushed out a tray of colored contacts. I deliberately stuck the light brown ones into my eyes. The combination of my natural red mixing with the brown was absolutely harmonious. I ran my fingers through my hair, carefully combing it into its proper place.

To complete the transformation I pulled on rugged jeans and white long-sleeved shirt, making me look like an underfed, ordinary teenager. Yes, the style did make me look like a younger man. Like a college student.

_Like my Lawli-pop…minus the skin and eye color of course…_

I strolled into the kitchen and snatched my keys from the table, today will be fun.

_Click click._

I locked my car as I casually walked into the extravagant, three level book store. I stepped inside, greeted with the strong smell of coffee and paper. It was actually quite relaxing. Walking around through each isle, I examined every person in the store.

_But who to pick? Who is going to get lucky today?_

I climbed up to the next level, dissatisfied that there was no one on the first floor of my liking. The second floor held all of the foreign language books and literature. I, knowing a few languages myself, frequently visited this particular floor. I strode past the Italian, Spanish, Japanese, and Portuguese sections until I reached the French novels and literature. While I loved all the other languages equally, I was in the mood for this particular language. But today was not really about me, but rather my chosen one. And by going to a book store, I would hope that she would be intelligent.

My eyes glazed over the titles of the books on the shelves, feeling a presence behind me. Out of character, my back completely straight, I twisted my shoulders around to see who was standing behind me.

_No way…Alexandria._

My face, feigning innocence, did not even twitch with discomfort. Instead, I was going to use this to my advantage. "I'm sorry, am I blocking your way?"

Her eyes lingered for a moment before falling back onto the book shelf. "Well, kind of…I just need to grab that book on the top shelf." She smiled apologetically.

"Oh, I'll get that for you." I stretched my left arm up, feeling her eyes fall onto my back. "Here you go." I returned her smile with my own. My lips stretching over my teeth accidentally cracking the skin, reopening a scab, damn it.

"Are you okay?" her eyes held concern as she watched the blood escape.

Immediately, I licked it away, forcing myself to blush. "Oops." I chuckled and turned around to fully face her. "I'm Valentine. What's your name?"

"Alexandria." I could feel her interest starting to dwindle as she pivoted on her heel and started walking away saying 'thank you'.

This is not good, I need to stop her. "Miss?"

Reluctantly she turned around, "Yes?"

"I'm so sorry to disturb you but…" I scratched my head and forced myself to blush more, trying to display genuine shyness. "…I am kind of new here. Could you show me around?"

She hesitated, then eventually took a deep breath and walked two steps forward, her heels clicking on the wooden floor. "I would love to but…I only have a bike so, I don't see how we could travel together--"

"Oh, that is okay! I have a car." I flashed my teeth at her again; I knew I was being an asshole. Even so, how could she refuse?

"Okay then…"

As we walked out towards my car, I mentally hugged myself for not showing her my car yesterday.

I pulled open her door and continued over to my side. I was surprised by her first statement.

"Just so we get things clear, how old are you? I hope old enough to drive." She half-joked, did she sense something odd?

I raised my eyebrows in surprise, "Relax Alex. I am nineteen years old; I have been licensed for quite some time, especially considering I moved from Hawaii where the driving age is fifteen." I smiled reassuringly as she relaxed in the passenger's seat, still looking less than pleasant to be here.

Well, I would have to change that.

As we drove through the streets she pointed out all of her favorite shopping centers, restaurants, and cinemas. We also drove through several complexes and neighborhoods. As I led my car to the obviously more poor part of town, she shifted her weight in discomfort.

As we passed by the graffiti engulfed buildings and the streets sprinkled with garbage and filth I turned my face in her direction, "We…are we?"

She inhaled deeply, and exhaled noisily, "Well, we shouldn't be here. This is where the _trash_ lives."

_Oh really Alexandria? Because this is where I lived…_

"I think I have to agree with you on that. We'll turn around in a second, let me just pull out my map…" I opened the middle console, hiding it from her view without looking suspicious. I twiddled the syringe between my fingers before nonchalantly piercing her neck with it. Her eyes immediately filled with tears but when she opened her mouth the protest, nothing came out.

I could no longer hold it in.

Ha-ha-heh! I laughed maniacally as the adrenaline coursed through the rest of my body. This particular syringe held one of my favorites, a serum that stopped all capabilities of speech.

I loved it.

I pulled back onto the road and drove into a familiar skinny alley. I rushed to her side and grabbed her waist, hoisting it over my shoulder. Thankfully, I did not have to worry about anyone seeing me because this was normal behavior in this neighborhood. Anybody passing by wouldn't dare stop me. I walked up to the black stair case and climbed up three flights of stairs.

_This is it._

I pushed open the door as the flashbacks hit me like a brick wall. I knew the day would come when I would return to this hell, but I also anticipated that when I did return, the power would have shifted to me. I threw Alexandria down onto the very couch my mother died on. It was yellowed, torn, and stained.

I clenched my fists as they trembled; my emotions mixing like a wildfire. Like I said before, I _knew_ this day would come, naturally I was prepared ages ago. I made my way over to the corner of the room and _click_, turned on the new camera John gave me. If only he knew…

_Keeshhhhh. _

The television screamed at me, beckoning to be turned to the correct channel. I glided my finger over the touch sensor knob until it reached the correct signal. I stuck in the wire from the video camera directly into the television, no patience to try and install the wireless system. The video room was small and square; flat screen televisions covered every inch of wall, minus the south facing wall which had a small leather love seat and a crate of more remotes and wires.

_Beep_

I pressed 'play' on the small camera and crawled back to the sofa. I almost jumped when I saw Alexandria on my parents couch, her hands and feet bound, as tears stained her pale face.

"_Why are you doing this? Who the fuck are you!? Who the FUCK ARE YOU??"_

My eyes widened with excitement as I saw myself come on the screen.

"_Now now Alexandria, it seems that the medicine has worn off…you can speak again."_

Her teeth grinding_, "Tell me where I am, who you are and what you want."_

"_Just like that?"_He walked up to her, his face only centimeters from her_. _He bent down towards her ear, _"I'm not telling you anything, figure it out yourself, you seem smart enough." _The man escaped from the cameras view then reappeared with a black bag, the kind you see at barber shops that holds all of their instruments_._

I shifted on the couch, holding in my excitement, the best is yet to come.

"_P-please. Don't do this…" _

The tall man stalked towards her, razor in hand, he rolled up his sleeves. I didn't take her long to see the contrast of his arms from his face.

"_J-just tell me wh-who you are?" _she managed between sobs. "_You…you're wearing a mask?"_

He smiled, his onyx hair covering his eyes, "_Good girl, I knew you were smart."_ He raised a singular finger and licked it, the proceeding to wipe it down his cheek revealing the smudged makeup.

He went back to the bag unraveling it and revealing all of the sharp tools inside, he was going to have fun. His hand hovered the mat before selecting his first tool, the classic razor.

The girls blue eyes widened as her mouth opened and closed, clearly trying to distract or postpone him.

"_In the car…you said your name was Valentine? That's not true…"_ The way she said it sounded more like a statement then a question.

Once more, the man flashed her a twisted smile_, "Correct again, Alexandria…"_

The man had a hint of aggravation in his voice. He sat next to her on the couch and stretched out one of her arms, she screamed in protest, begging for him to stop.

His first laceration was deep and long, going from the top of her wrist to her elbow, her forearm leaking out blood. What was even better was her reaction, silent tears fell from her swollen eyes, her mouth open but nothing passed it.

"_Did I take your breath away?"_ He smiled, licking his bottom lip, getting a rise out of her reactions. _"Then I shall continue love."_

The beautiful man continued slicing her now tainted skin. By the time he was finished, her back, chest, arms, and legs were _covered_ with cuts.

Her eyes flickered and her head swayed back and forth, passing out was inevitable for this one. Moments after she passed out, the thin male crawled on top of her, yanked her hair up, and pressed his lips onto hers.

_Beep beep beep_.

The video shut off, the screens reverting back to blue.

Those lips, they were so…soft. I got up and exited the video room, going to check on Alexandria down stairs after last night's travel back to the warehouse, I wanted to be sure she survived for further festivities. As I started descending down the stairs, I stopped, and turned around remembering that I had locked her in my bedroom, more to confuse her than to comfort her, you see. I stuck the key into the lock and punched in the code to open the door.

The room was all white: the walls, bed, carpet, sheets, _everything_ white and pure. It was almost blinding to look at. And then I saw it, my prize. Under the thick white comforter was my sleeping angel. I stepped softy on the ground, pulled up the cover and slipped into its warmth, careful not to shift the bed so much. I tried to relax but every time I looked at her I thought of our previous activities. My pants seemed to be shrinking…I need to solve this problem…now. I pressed my hand onto her untouched face as she shifted her position and her eyes flickered open.


	9. Never fake it

The pulsing beneath my jeans wouldn't stop. I needed it so badly. I watched Alexandria's eyes flutter open, still half asleep. I watched her curiously, as beads of sweat dripped down my face at a tormenting, slow pace. She brought up a hand to rub her eyes but immediately winced as fresh scabs cracked open, her eyes swelled with tears, realizing where she was as she gazed up at me. She opened her mouth, as if contemplating whether to scream, but then closed it a short moment later. She only closed her eyes, tears leaking out of the corners as she accepted her fate. When her lids opened, they were sending me silent pleads.

It was not enough.

I observed as they dilated with fear, my eyes must have appeared hungry and merciless. I couldn't take it anymore…

I threw off the bed sheet exposing her tortured body. She whimpered as a skinny finger traced down her shoulder to her abdomen, and her abdomen to her thigh. I tore off her grungy, shredded clothes and stared at her.

_I need this now…_

I guaranteed her immobility by pinning down her hips on the blood stained bed, straddling her with my legs. I pulled my sweat saturated shirt off of myself and threw it blindly across the room. I was about to unbutton my jeans, that would have just as easily slid off, when I paused and looked up at her. She was clenching her necklace in her hand.

"Let me see that. Now…" I tried my best to be patient.

It didn't work.

I smacked her hand, reopening a few scabs, as she retracted her bloody paw. I grew inflamed with anger as I saw the small rosary land on her chest. I snatched it up and ripped it from her neck.

"Were you…praying?" I looked at her, feigning innocence. She looked down and nodded. I launched the rosary to the other side of the room, and smacked her across her face. "Don't. No one is going to help you."

"Please…just tell me who you are…" her eyes were hidden by her disheveled strands of black silk.

I disregarded her request and motioned her hand to the top of my jeans. "They are not going to unbutton themselves my little _strawberry_."

She gasped, and immediately coughed, choking on the thick saliva in her mouth.

"A-…Akira?"

The corners of my mouth twitched up into a demonic smile as her respiratory system quickened with every breath.

"No…NO! This isn't real…," she looked up to me, pleading, "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?"

_Don't scream at me bitch._

"My pants are still fastened, change that right now. I _won't_ ask again."

Her hands trembled as they neared the button, carefully pushing it through the material and unzipping the jeans. I stood up above her, the bed creaking and moving with uncertainty. I pulled my remaining clothes off, feeling her eyes on my body.

_I bet she is looking at my scars…no, my beauty marks._

"Forever?"

_I knew it._

"Akira…you don't have to do this. I can help—"

"SHUT THE _FUCK _UP!" My fists clenched and my jaw trembled, "Fucking psych majors…"

My knees caved in, forcing me on top of her. Once again, she clenched her eyes shut as if hoping it was a bad dream. My pressed myself on her, my mouth hovering over her ear, "This is _all real._"

Without warning I pressed myself inside of her fully, aggressively. She screamed in pain, pleads for me to stop pouring out of her mouth. I purred at the sound of her screams, deep moans escaping my mouth, penetrating the walls. Again, I started thrusting into her, without warning as she continued to cry and beg.

"You know _you like it_…just fucking taking it, slut."

I grabbed her hips, pressing deeper into her. I was surprised to see no blood flowing out of her, so it was safe to say she wasn't a virgin?

"You're not even pure…fucking whore." I knew she tried with every fiber of her being to resist the urge to submit to me as I made her nerves jolt with pleasure.

"I'm not going to stop until you scream my name…"

As I continued plunging into her, I could sense her attempt to obey me.

"A-Akira…" she said quietly, her face flushed as tears streamed out of her lifeless eyes.

"_Don't _fake it."

As I neared my climax, I seized her hair and pulled her face to mine, "It's Beyond. Say it."

Moments later as I thrust my last into her; I felt her body contracting underneath mine as she yelped my name.

Fucking beautiful.

I collapsed on top of her, curious as to why she was not attempting to push me off of her. Was she giving up?

Well this was no fun.

I lay on top of her for several more moments, our perspiration mixing as I sucked on her neck.

I rolled onto the opposing side of the bed, sitting up as I looked around. Her lifeless eyes penetrated my happiness and angered me to no end.

I slid down on the bed, lying on my side, facing her "What is it?"

She continued to stare off into space, as if she were a vegetable. "Hey," I said more aggressively, "What are you thinking about?"

"You have a brother."

I immediately stopped inhaling. _H-how did she know?_

"I know where he is." The words passed her lips nonchalantly as she continued to stare off.

"W-what?"

She flicked her eyes over to mine, "I could take you to him; tell you where he is."

Could it be…my Lawli-pop?

"Stop lying, or else I will have to…," I stroked her arm, "…draw on you again."

She pulled her arm away, "I am _not_ lying." I pushed myself off the bed and pulled on clean boxers. I grabbed her arm and yanked her off the bed as well, "Come on."

"W-what? Where are we going? P-please let me go…I listened to everything you said!" I dug into my drawer and pulled out clothes for her and me.

"Dress quickly. The day is young and we have places to go."

"Is this about your brother?"

I turned to face her, "Yes. Where is Lawliet?"

She stepped back, "No…no. I won't bring you to him!"

I grabbed her shirt and pulled her up towards me, "And why the fuck not?"

"B-because…"

"He is _my_ brother! Fucking TELL ME WHERE HE IS…or you can guarantee a long, slow execution tonight." I pulled her out of the bed room, hastily undoing the locks as I shoved her into the holding chamber, unzipping a bag, showing her a rotting corpse.

She screamed and backed into me, her hands covering her eyes, as she gagged at the smell. "Okay…okay…"

She collapsed on the cement floor and sobbed.

"Why won't you just tell me and make this simple?"

She tried to even her breathing, "Y-you're just g-going…to hurt him; just like you're h-hurt…h-hurting me!"

My eyes narrowed in confusion, "And why do you care so much if he gets hurt?"

"B-because…" she looked up into my crimson eyes as she spoke, her own eyes swollen and bloodshot, "…because I love him."


	10. Breaking Lawliet

_Drip._

_Drip._

_Drip, drip._

As if in slow-motion, the thick drops of substance rhythmically dripped from the cuff bound wrists. My left hand tightened its grasp on the whip. Alexandria's bare back was hunched over, as she sat lifelessly on the metal chair, wrists and ankles bound. The lights of the basement cringed on and off, the helpless girl's pathetic whimpers breaking the silence.

I walked over to Alexandria and crouched down; I was concerned that she wasn't speaking. It was very uncharacteristic of her.

But she has been like this lately; day after day… She won't speak to me, only screams or gasps. And her eyes, that once resembled the Pacific Ocean, lively and vivacious; now looked like two aquamarine gems, still beautiful yet utterly lifeless. There was something…something just not right about it.

"Alexandria…"

Her head continued to hang down, her upper body limp over her legs. My eyes grazed over her exposed back, or what used to be of it. Her clothing was torn to shreds, several hundred lashes sliced her back open; her screams, almost unbearable.

_Almost…_

She needed to be punished! For the past four weeks I have been questioning her, trying to get anything out of her to find my brother, my Lawliet.

My heart nearly sprang from my chest when she whispered, "They're going to find me, you know? They'll get you…"

"You think so?" I glanced around the room, inhaling the aroma of fresh strawberries. "Honestly Alexandria, I find that hard to believe. The police don't know what they're doing…They're still looking for that Christine girl!"

She lifted her head, "Th…that was you?"

My signature blood thirsty grin stretched across my face. "Let us not change the subject Christine. Have you forgotten the whole reason you're down here?" I slid her chair around, obnoxiously loud, to face the opposite wall where my prized possession was kept.

Hundreds and hundreds of photographs, drawings, and sketches covered the entire wall. Countless pictures of _my_ Lawli-pop decorated the wall.

"Remember, that you are being punished. Girls who misbehave…" I stroked a finger over her swollen red back, "…get punished." I wanted so badly to knock her face into the cement floor and see her brain splatter. "Now, _where_ _is he_?"

She yelped as I dug my nails into her already cleaved-up back.

"I- I can't tell you…"

I could feel my hemoglobin boil. _How long would she keep this up?_ I wanted nothing more than to execute her but…she had very, very valuable information.

"You think _you_ love Lawliet?" I shook my head as I walked up to the wall, stroking a long, white finger to a picture, "No, no _I_ love him! And he…"

"…doesn't love you." She spat with tear-glistened eyes.

I clenched the picture in my hand, crumbling it.

"You think so?" I pulled a small lighter out of my pocket and flicked it on, holding the wrinkled picture over it.

She tried looking into my eyes, _trying_ ever so hard to figure out my next move. We both watched as the small picture burst into flames and gradually transformed into tiny embers.

"You think he loves _you_ more than _I_?"

"No, I never said tha-"

"I noticed Alexandria that you were not pure when I first made love to you. This upsets me…was it _him_?" I spat out every syllable with ever-growing frustration.

Fresh tears flowed out of her swollen, puffy eyes.

I held the lighter close to her face, threateningly. "Tell me, now."

"Y-yes…"

Anyone else would have exploded and sliced her throat right there. I however, had a better idea. I pulled of the shreds of cloth covering her lower body and spread her legs apart.

"…Beyond…n-not again…" Her face wrinkled up as she hung her head.

I looked up to her and smiled, "Don't you worry. I guarantee I have not done this before…"

While she debated whether this was a good or bad thing, I flicked on the lighter and held it right near her reproductive organ.

"Beyo-AAAAAAAHHHHH….P-PLEASE STO-AAAHHHH…."

I held the lighter between her legs for only a bit more, making sure my task was complete.

"Now you will NEVER enjoy his love or anyone's love EVER again."

She threw her head back, wailing in pain, the momentum causing her to fall over on the cold, blood-stained ground.

I brushed her hair out of her face, "So does he really love you more?"

I cackled as I walked up the stairs, leaving her behind naked, cold, and severely traumatized on the concrete floor. I flicked the light switch off and continued up to the main floor of the warehouse.

I twisted the cap off of the jar of jelly and dug my hand in the jar. I sucked the jelly off of my hand as I thought about what to do.

I needed to see my brother…there was so much me needed to talk about.

_I walked up to the little raven haired boy hugging his knees in the corner of our bedroom. The room was tiny, barely fitting the twin sized mattress we shared. As I watched the small boy tremble, I felt the hot, salty tears roll down my cheek. I placed a small hand on his shoulder, shuddering at my touch. _

"_Did they hurt you?" I put my other hand under his tear-stained chin and lifted his face to meet my gaze._

_He nodded weakly and covered his face as he continued to sob._

_I wrapped my arms around him, trying to comfort him in any way I could. He wrapped his arms around my waist, responding to my touch, burying his head into my chest. _

"_It was awful B…I feel so…" _

_I tightened my grasp on my twin, stroking his hair as I hid my internal fury towards our parents._

_The boy, two minutes my younger, looked up at me with his large onyx orbs, "I want to die!" Fresh tears leaked out of his eyes. _

_My world stopped._

_I could not imagine a life without Lawliet, we needed each other._

_I choked back tears, "L…Lawli…You can't do that to me…"_

"_But it hurts so badly B. I don't want to be scared to come home! I don't want to have to stay awake all night praying that they won't come in for me, for us. I don't want them to touch me! I WANT TO DIE!"_

_His words stung me._

"_No Lawliet. We need to survive this, even if for only a bit longer. We're almost there…And now I have Asher! He is always trying to help! Why don't you like him?"_

_He tore away from my embrace, standing a good three feet away from me. _

"_He is not good for you! He is taking you away from me! He is evil…" _

_My head spun, how could he think such a thing? Asher was saving me! "Why would you say that? I love—"_

"_You what, love him?" He spat the words out, staring out of the broken window. "He doesn't love you…"_

_That was all I could take. _

_SLAP._

_Lawliet held his face as blood dripped out. His head was bowed down, his body trembling as hysterical laughter seeped out._

"_Hyahayhya…You're choosing HIM?" He turned his body to face me, eyes narrowing. _

_I shook my head confused, "Lawli-pop, I am not choosing anyone! You are my brother and he is my lover—"_

"_NO! HE IS NOT! Stop saying that…he. Does. Not. Love. You." _

_He stalked towards me, cornering me as he placed his arms at either side of my face on the wall._

_He face only inches from mine, I looked away from his intense gaze, worried about is his attitude lately. This kind of behavior worried me…_

_I could feel his hot breath passing my face, his natural smell of strawberry filling my nasal way._

"_Beyond…If I don't get out of here, I will surely die."_

_My eyes flicked up to him, "L, that is what I have been saying the whole time but, you must wait. You must have patience. We need to finish school, so we can go to college and start our lives."_

"_I don't need college…I just want to fade away…"_

"_Lawli, we're going to get out. I know it. The abuse will stop, and our lives will begin. You'll see… Asher will help us." _

_I watched as the mention of my loves name made Lawliet cringe._

"_Stop talking about him. I __**hate**__ him."_

"_If this is about me choosing, I am not choosing anyone! I don't have to!"_

"_But I want you! All to myself everyday! I want to be with you and only you. I want to wake up in the morning and see you at my side, in a house, a real house. We would be so happy, and __**I**__ would guarantee that happiness. Don't you see B? __**I love you.**__"_

_An audible gasp escaped my lips as he wiped away my tears._

"_La…Lawliet…this…th-this is not right. We are brothers, twin brothers. This is highly frowned upon and just not supposed to be." I looked up at the ceiling thinking of about one hundred and fifty other reasons why this was not right and would not happen, when I felt his soft, smooth lips press onto mine sweetly, and carefully. I wanted to lift my arms are push him away, but memories of my parents, my mother specifically flicked back into my mind. My mother had favored me, while my father favored Lawliet. More often than not we were trapped in their equally disgusting room, forced to have or do things with them, or watch them. If we disobeyed… the punishment, they guaranteed would be worse than death._

_Those kisses were rough, disgusting, and painful. How could I break away from an embrace like this? It made me feel loved and complete, even Asher did not has this power._

_Eventually, I broke away from the gentle kisses, blood rushing to my cheeks. _

"_Lawliet…I know that this may seem right…but you don't want me…" he opened his mouth to protest, but I held up a hand, objecting, "…you just like the idea of me. Trust me, I know you want love but d-don't do this…" _

_Of course mentally I was punching myself, I wanted him too. I wanted to live my life with Lawliet but…I have Asher and besides, I needn't even explain why this would be 'unconventional' to say the least._

"…_but B. What am I supposed to do?" _

_Knock knock._

_Both of our heads shot up to see Asher knocking on the window, standing on the fire escape._

_Seeing Lawliet pinning me to the wall, he questioned with a raised eyebrow, "Am I…interrupting something?"_

_I spoke quickly, "No, no…I was just getting ready to meet you." I smiled apologetically at him, totally forgetting about our plans for today._

_He poked his head through the broken window, "Well, I'll just wait down the stairs. Hurry, love." He smiled at me, then at Lawliet as he escaped down the stairs._

"_I can't believe you're leaving me…even now."_

"_Lawli-pop, I'm sorry…"_

"_NO! JUST GO, YOU"VE MADE YOUR CHOICE." _

_I tried consoling him as I hastily changed my clothes._

"_Brother…" I raised a hand to his shoulder._

_He shrugged it off, "Just go…but when you come back; don't expect me to be the same." He looked at me disappointedly, "You have broken me, Beyond."_

I threw the glass jar across the room, the noise echoing through the building.

"It's my entire fault…Lawliet…why did you leave me?"

I grabbed the cars keys and headed out not even sure myself as to where I was going.


	11. La Luna

The lowering sun eagerly shed its last bit of shine into the forest surrounding the stream. The fresh water skidded and skipped down the obstacle of pebbles, stones, and fallen branch. I laid down on the crispy leaves and looked up towards the sky.

The sun, still struggling for dominance as the moon hung high in the sky.

In a mere matter of minutes the entire forest turned dark. My skin crawled with every gust of wind, my eyes blinded by the night, my ears more sensitive to every audible sound. I clutched my car keys in my hand, still not sure as to why I still had them, when I had only walked about a mile away from the warehouse.

_Crrrunch._

My heart accelerated as I pushed the key in between the slits of my two fingers, ready to scratch and punch if needed. My eyes shot up, and having adapted to the dark, could see the outline of a person about twenty feet away.

Without noise, I rolled behind a thick tree and observed the stranger of the night.

From what I could see, it was most likely a woman.

I hate women.

I could see the outline of long tangled hair hanging from her scalp.

I could see her silhouette so easily in the moonlight, her shape, everything. Almost as if…she was naked?

She twisted and turned her head frantically, I almost felt bad watching as the girl started crying. She turned her face away and dug her face into her arm.

_Was she muffling her cries?_

Just as she turned her body in a new direction I saw it…

…the scratches.

Oh, Alexandria….I'll admit she is good, no superior for getting this far, but this is where her treasure hunt will end.

Grateful that my bare feet concealed my location I slowly walked towards her, until—

_SNAP_

Shit…I looked at the branch underneath me then back at her.

Her reaction however, was unexpected, even by me.

Her head shot up towards me, looking me straight in the eyes. Her eyes welled up with tears, "Oh thank goodness I found you! I found you….found you, found you…."

Has she lost it?

She clutched herself to me, wrapping her arms around me with immense pressure. "Oh thank you! Thank God I found you…"

Was it Stockholm syndrome? I knew sometimes a thing like this _could_ happen, but I never thought it would.

Whatever the reason, I gave in to my inner child and held her back delicately, stroking her hair as she sobbed into my black tee shirt.

_Vmmmm. Vmmmm._

I felt a small square vibrating on my back as she retracted her arms, looking the mobile phone like she had never seen one before.

"Alexandria…How did you get your phone back?" My tone grew angry and impatient.

Her eyes danced back and forth, looking from my face, to the phone, and back to my face.

"Well?" I grabbed her chin, "Who the fuck is calling?"

She raised a thin pale finger, "Y-you."

My thin eyebrows scrunched up in confusion as I snatched the phone out of her feeble hands.

_L calling…_

L? But…does she think?

"L?! We need to get out of here; you have no idea what a monster this guy is! Please, L! Listen to me!" She placed her palm on my cheek, "We need to leave before he hurts you…"

My brain was ready to burst with all of the calculations I was performing in my mind. Alexandria _must_ be a) delusional or b) honestly convinced that I am L, my Lawli-pop.

I mean…I am dressed like him, we are twins, and the fact that it is night is only encouraging her to believe I am him.

"Alexandria…" I tenderly grabbed her hand, "Trust me my love; we will be gone from this underworld soon. But first, I would like to pay my brother a visit." I started walking back towards the warehouse, hoping with every ounce of my soul and being that the real Lawliet would be back there.

"Uh…L…no…" she attempted to pull back, "NO! I am NOT going back there! Do you have any idea what I have just been through?"

I grabbed her hips and threw her over my shoulder, "I have an idea."

I sped off running back, hoping that with the added weight I could get back to the warehouse in about fifteen or sixteen minutes.

Throughout the whole run, Alexandria continued to kick and scream, but she was still unaware of a very important detail. This was not L she was dealing with…

"L, come on," she whimpered between words, "we…we d-don't need to go back…he will kill us! I do not care if he is your brother!"

I could see the beautiful sight of the warehouse as I ran up the hill. I tilted my face in her direction, "Alexandria, please. He is my brother…this may be the last time I see him."

I set her down when we were in a one hundred yard radius and held her hand. "How exactly did you escape love?"

She looked down, a reaching up to massage her temples, "It was not without difficulty…" she raised her once bound ankles towards me, and pointed to her ankles, that were now red and raw, even a bit of bone exposed in places. "Once I was unbound I ran into any and all of the rooms I could." Her chin trembled as her voice broke, "…at…f-first I saw the room were…he..h-he keeps his…"

I patted her hair and encouraged her to continue, fuck, I need to know.

"…his victims…he keeps their rotting, tortured corpses! He is a fucking psycho! Why is he not in an asylum…I'm sorry I know he is your brother but…"

"It is okay love, just continue. Tell me everything…"

"After I ran out of that room, there was a room full of televisions and cameras…he must tape all of his victims and watch it later…fucking sick." She swallowed and cleared her throat, "There was a bedroom where I stayed when he did not request I stay in his room. So there are at least two bedrooms I know of. And a kitchen…but the only thing in the fridge…"

As we neared the door back into her personal hell, I held the steel door open and pushed her in, "…jelly right?"

I locked the door and knocked her down the short stairwell.

"No, no, NO!!! FUCK! HELP ME! L! ANYONE!" She limped into the next room, escaping my sight.

I sprinted after her and marveled at the sight I found.

"Hello, Lawliet…"


	12. Steps

"Hello, Lawliet…"

Alexandria ran towards him, clinging onto his arm, "Please! L, _please_ we have got to call the police." Tears were bursting from her eyes, "He is fucking crazy, I know you said not to call anyone else…but p-please…"

I could feel a twisted demonic smile form on my face as I watched Lawliet, _my Lawliet_, peel off his shirt and hand it to Alexandria whose clothing had been destroyed.

He took strong, slow steps towards me. My heart was about to burst with all the excitement, my Lawli-pop…coming towards me.

When he stopped only a foot in front of me, I opened my mouth to speak, but a fist crashed into my jaw. And it fucking hurt, I could see the blood that spurted out of my mouth. My hand held my jaw; my hair fell in the way of my eyes. There was so much to be said, so much my Lawli-pop _needed _to know.

I started rising my head back up to meet his fixed glare.

"Lawli…It is so nice of you to come visit." I wiped the stream of blood off on my sleeve. "It has been what…?"

"Five years, roughly."

His voice sent electric shocks down my vertebrae. I felt so- so overjoyed he was here, with me. I broke out into fits of laughter.

"Why are laughing!?" His voice rose, and-

_SMACK_

"Ooo…Lawli-pop. You have really got to stop all the smacking." I gestured towards my face, "Look at how you make me bleed?" I stepped closer to him, seeing my reflection in his large onyx eyes. "You know how much I like blood…"

_PUSH_

I pulled at his white shirt and pushed him into to concrete wall, butterflies consuming my stomach as he winced in pain.

"Beyond…I am going to fucking kill you." His nostrils flared as his voice rose, "After everything you have done, it is never _enough_ is it??"

Lawliet attempted many times to punch, kick, and elbow me, failing each time.

"You see little brother? You are not going to win." I dunked my hand into the pocket of my jeans and pulled out the familiar small cutting knife. "Now you listen to **me**." I dug my knife into his upper arm, only a little, to confirm my sincerity. "I'm not fucking around. Now stay where you are."

I turned back and walked deeper into the room, opening a cabinet, shuffling around for the item I needed. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Alexandria run up to him and hold him. I found the item in the cabinet and clenched it in my hand, continuing to watch as she held him, stroked his hair…kissed him?

"Fucking bitch…GET OFF OF HIM! NOW!" I pointed to her, "You…come here now- NO! Lawliet…you stay where you are…" I grabbed Alexandria's wrist, forcing her to follow me. I aggressively held her wrist with one hand as the other handcuffed Lawliet to the nearest drain pipe.

"Hey…B! Please don't hurt her!"

"Oh. B, is it? You're using nicknames..already that comfortable?" I pushed him back onto the ground.

"Now, now…Alexandria? Is there something you want to tell you beloved boyfriend?"

"N-no…" she managed between sobs.

I held the knife to her throat and whispered into her ear, "Come on now. Don't be shy…"

I pressed the blade onto her skin, hoping to extract the statement from her, I was so damn excited.

"L…" she wiped the tears from her face, "Your brother…h-he—"

"I FUCKING RAPED HER! HYAYAYAYA…" Oh God, I loved it. I have never felt more alive.

Alexandria buried her face into her shirt, her hands pulling at her long black hair. In front of us, Lawliet sat stunned; his face color, normally quite pale, was elevating to a deep strawberry color. Clearly he was enraged.

He attempted to confront me; the chain yanked him back, which made me continue to laugh.

"I have to admit brother; she was…QUITE A HANDFUL!! HYAHAHAHA!"

_Clinck, clinck_

Lawliet tried with all his strength to reach out to Alexandria, who I had gripped by my arms. She was not going anywhere.

Sweat trickled down Lawliet's face to his neck, his neck to his chest, his chest to his abdomen, his abdomen to his—

"BEYOND!" the chained up man clenched his eyes shut and growled, "…you fucking bastard."

I'm a…bastard?

Maybe, I should lighten the mood.

"Hey! Hey Lawli-pop! Guess what?" My eyes widened as I held Alexandria in front of me and spread her legs in front of him.

He tilted his head confused.

"BAHAHA…I BURNED HER!!!!" I was laughing so hard, I could feel tears leak out of my eyes. "SHE WILL NEVER ENJOY YOUR LOVE AGAIN! HAHAHA!!!"

I grabbed Alexandria's face and aggressively kissed her cheek, and started biting it.

It was as if the man had lost all sense of control, "B…h-how..I-I.." he started bawling like child, rocking himself back and forth.

I continued to laugh, "How could you even love someone like her?"

He looked up, "You fucker! I love Alexandria! And you…how could you do this to her? To anyone!"

So, he was trying to make me feel bad, was he?

I could play that game too.

"You should have heard her scream my name," I threw Alexandria to the ground and bent to Lawliet's ear, "like…a…WHORE." I backed up enough to wear he could not grab me, and watched him as he uselessly struggled against the iron locks.

I wanted to talk to him more…but Alexandria, she was a distraction. And I only wanted to talk about Lawliet, to Lawliet.

I grabbed her arm and dragged her up.

"Ohhh God, please! Don't hurt me—"

"-Oh, shut up whore. I am talking you to your holding chamber. Me and Lawli-pop need some alone time." I smirked devilishly as I thought of all the things that would soon occur.

I dragged her up the stairs and shoved her into her room, locking the door behind her.

Now…back to Lawli-pop…

I took my time descending down the stairs, carefully placing my foot with each step. I wanted to enter the room that held Lawliet as inconspicuously as possible.

Only ten more steps to go…

Ten, _I want to tell him everything…_

Nine, _I want to know why…_

Eight, _I want to hurt him…_

Seven, _I want to hold him…_

Six, _I want him to tell me everything…_

Five, _I want to keep him here forever…_

Four, _I want him to like me…_

Three, _I want to tell him…_

Two, …_tell him I love him…_

One, _I want him to love me…_

I stepped into the blood stained room, watching Lawliet as he lay, back towards me, breathing steadily as he hummed to himself.


	13. 13 13

_Ever since Lawliet…kissed me…things changed._

_He distanced himself from me, hating me for 'choosing' Asher, not ever meeting my gaze._

_It has been three months since our last confrontation…I was worried about him; he was my brother after all. _

_I laid on the small bare mattress we both shared, hugging my knees, my chin resting on my arms as I looked toward the closed door._

_How small and dilapidated are room truly was…_

_The mattress was surrounded by a perimeter of books (stolen of course), newspapers, and the few clothing articles we had. Nothing of ours was truly valuable…I don't even think Lawliet and myself are considered valuable._

_I braced myself for the screams that I knew would soon come. It had been three minutes and thirteen seconds since my father had pulled Lawliet up by his hair, and dragged him towards his room. _

_Only a matter of time—_

"_AHHHHH!" _

_The screams were different this time…muffled? Would our father really go so far?_

"_AHHHHH…EEE…EEE!! EEELLLP!" _

_But again, I knew…_

_I could do __**nothing**__._

_A single tear traced down the contours of my face, crawling down at a dreadfully slow pace. I wanted so much to run into the next room and save Lawliet…to save him from every misfortune. But the penalty…would be severe. I knew my father would kill me, not quickly though._

_He would make me beg for death._

_**Beg**_

_I hate people who beg…I knew I would not allow myself to become one._

_Creaaaaak._

_I watched, my heart rate accelerating to a dangerous rate, as my door slowly opened._

_My heart once again shattered, as Lawliet stumbled in, lips shaking, eyes lifeless, body coated in perspiration, with the occasional 'love-bite' as my father liked to call them. _

_His feet dragging on the floor, he walked into the room._

_His foot stuck on the edge of the mattress, causing him to stumble on our bed._

_In that whole sequence I did not even see him blink once. _

_I was shaking. I was so full of anger, and hate, I couldn't control myself. But instead of yelling and Lawliet, demanding answers as to what had happened; I used my energy to lie next to him._

"_Lawliet…?" _

_I needed to help him…how long could he go on, not talking to me?_

_I lowered my voice to a subtle whisper as I eyed the gap underneath the door, carefully observing the shadows. "Lawli…?"_

_The boy next to me continued to stare, facing me general direction, but not actually at me._

_I raised my hand to his hair, "Lawli-pop?"_

_SMACK_

"_Do not touch me." _

_I was shocked at his aggressiveness. My own eyes welled up with tears. I quickly rolled onto my opposite side, concealing my tiny whimpers._

_Whimpers…what were they other than silent screams for help? Help that would come from a God? No…I had my share of prayers. God never came. Not once. I figure that if he has not responded in seventeen years, continuing would only be giving my false hope._

_How many nights Lawliet and myself stayed up praying to a God who abandoned- no, I would not even go so far to say abandoned- he was never there for us at all._

_That is all religion was and ever will be._

_**False hope**_

_My tears soon dried as I gained my composure. _

_And suddenly it hit me._

_The solution to all of our problems…_

_Lawliet would talk to me again, we would not get hurt anymore, and we…_

_We would be free…_

_I sat up, surprising Lawliet, as he jumped with chock at my sudden movement. I crawled across the room to a small cardboard box, its surface area covered with pictures of strawberries and random newspaper clippings. Lawliet and I made this box, and kept all of our most precious items inside. _

_I pulled out the cutting knife that I usually carried around at all times. I held it close to me, cradling it like a mother would her child. _

_That day…that day I found this knife…_

_I knew it would come to real use, I knew it had a true purpose…and I only now realized what I was to do with it._

_Yes…this knife would be the cause of my own parents' pain and suffering…and death._

_I silently rose up, and shoved the knife into my jeans pocket. _

_There was no going back._

_I turned to Lawliet, "L…listen to me. Trust me when I say this brother, you need to get out of the house right now." _

_He looked towards me, and raised his eye brows, not taking me seriously._

"_L Lawliet…if you do not leave…" I tried thinking of an impromptu lie, "…father will pick you and not me! He asked me to request you leave."_

_I could see L calculating the situation in his mind. He looked so small, so sad. I held my arms up and wrapped it around his shaking shoulders, humming a familiar tune, a sort of lullaby we hummed to each other at night. It was the only nice thing about our nights, and days for that matter._

"_Just…just go to Asher's!" _

_The moment I said his name I could see his face contort, annoyed. But I knew he would listen, he would…_

_Lately that has been our only escape…Asher always asks us to come when we can. _

_I was shocked to see Lawliet open his mouth, "T-this…does not feel right Beyond." He tilted his head, his tormented eyes searching my face, "…what are you really going t-to do?"_

_I pressed my eyelids shut, "Go to Asher's." _

_His eyes flicked down to the floor, "B-beyond…Asher…h-he…"_

"…_is going to take good care of you." I put my hands on his shoulders, "Now go! I will meet you by his place later. Go!"_

_He crawled out of the broken window, feet clanging down the fire escape._

_When will he ever appreciate what that man is doing for us? Is he really that jealous?_

_No matter, there are more pressing issues at hand. _

_Today, my parents are going to die._

_Today, we would be set free._

_Today, our suffering would cease._

_Tomorrow…he should, no, would, surely like me again…_


	14. Asher, Asher, We All Fall Down

Silently, I stepped on the last step and into the room.

Lawliet continued to hum and rock himself back and forth. He seemed almost peaceful…

I would have loved to even just stay where I was, and look at him for hours but—no, I things to do.

I crouched down by Lawli-pop, his head shot up at the sound of my knees cracking.

"B-B…wh-where's Alexan…"

"She is in her room." I tilted my head curiously as the fresh tears streamed his face. "Why do you cry, Lawliet?"

He puffed air out of his mouth, "Beyond…I love her. What else?"

"You do not love her."

"Oh, yeah?"

"She does not love you."

"B…you don't even know her."

"Sure I do, we had an art class together. She's extraordinary!"

"Beyond Birthday—"

"—Lawli-pop remembers my name?"

"Yes…I do. I am your brother," I could see him struggle to spit out the words, "B, when I left…It's not like I forgot about you…"

I sat in front of him as he lay on the ground, hands still bonded to the nearest pipe. I rubbed my eyes and ruffled my greasy hair. "That is precisely what I want to talk about."

He looked away and pressed his eyelids closed, "I knew this moment would come sometime."

"L Lawliet…how you have changed…What are you college now?" I shook my head disbelievingly, "Lawli, that day…I mean…if you really hated me that much…why did you not tell?"

Lawliet opened his mouth to speak several times, and finally spit out, "B-because…even if you are… what you are…you are also my only family. I just think I could have done that. Besides, I think we both know I was not exactly perfect either."

I shook my head at his words, "Oh no, no, no Lawli…you have never killed someone before. You've never seen the light leave there stunned eyes. People always seem to show their true character, when one is moments away from death." I got up and paced towards the fridge, "You do not know that." I grabbed a cold jar of jelly and sat back down in front of Lawliet.

L's eyebrows rose, "You still eat that crap?"

My cheeks reddened a little, "Uh, yeah." I continued to lick the jelly off my fingers, "Well, I have given you the floor. Are you not going to ask me something? Or tell me something? Nothing?"

His eyes were covered by his wild black hair, but even I could see his jaw tremble. I saw as his Adam's apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed.

"So...uh..w-what ever happened to…?" His eyes looked up, hoping that I would understand.

"To…who? Just say it, I shouldn't get mad…"

Keyword: shouldn't

But I knew there was always the possibility.

"What happened t-to A...A-Asher…?"

_CRACK_

The jelly jar slipped out of my hand and landed on the floor, not shattering but cleanly cracked into two halves. The red substance stained the floor, some getting on Lawliet's bare chest.

I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry, I wanted to run away and scream, I wanted to scratch myself until I bled.

But instead, I simply sat there in my stationary crouch, eye lids half opened, as if the question did not even faze me.

"Asher Ticket was taken away from me."

That is all there was too it.

Lawliet scooted himself up, sitting across from me in his own crouch.

"Why?" It sounded more like a demand than a question.

That was **it**.

I shot my head up to meet his onyx eyes, tears outlining the perimeter of my own, "He was taken away from me! The police took him and never said why! The only person to ever show me any kindness in this world…THEY TOOK HIM FROM ME…"

My body began shaking with fury, "SO WHO EVEN KNOWS IF HE IS DEAD OR DYING, IN JAIL OR NOT!"

"Beyond…I—"

"—NO! DO NOT EVEN…" I inhaled deeply, trying to calm myself, for I knew if I got too riled things would end badly, "…do not even say anything…I know you hated him."

Lawliet grew frightened with my reaction and tried standing up forgetting the chains as he unwillingly was pulled back down.

My head was spinning as I stood up menacingly and grabbed the top half of the broken jar.

"KYAHAHAHAHA…KYAHAHAHA!!!" I threw my head back in laughter as Lawliet inched as close to the wall as he could. "Oh Lawliet….How you will bleed!!!! KYAHAHA!!"

"Beyond! STOP! What the fuck are you doing?!"

"Aw…Lawli-pop…don't be afraid…" I licked my lips, salivating at the thought of his blood, "…don't be such a buzz kill, I just would like to play a game." I formed a familiar, deranged crooked smile across my face and I neared the sharp glass to his heart. "Don't worry Lawli…you'll know once I'm finished when I shout 'Game over'! Easy, right?"

I dug the glass into his chest, every line; every incision had to be perfect.

I watched as Lawliet bit his bottom lip to hold back the screams that were trying so hard to escape his mouth.

"Does Lawliet not want to scream because of…" I pointed a finger up, suggesting Alexandria.

"T-that…a-and…I…" he held his breath as I made my deepest cut yet, he was biting so hard on his lip that it had started to bleed, "…and I don't want to give you the satisfaction of my screams…"

"KYAHAHA…DAMN L, YOU'RE RIGHT! IT WOULD THRILL ME. SCREAM FOR ME L!"

My eyes widened as I stared back at his chest, my full name was carved perfectly into his pale white chest and abdomen.

"You bastard! Let me go!!"

I raised a finger to his lips, "Hush now little Lawli…Did I say game over yet?"

PLUNK

Black matter began eating up the corners of the room…my vision was slipping…

As if in a fish bowl, I looked up as Lawliet waved the other half of the jam jar in front of my face. My eyes widened…how could I be so careless?

"GAME OVER!"

And then the darkness took over my sight…


	15. Dormitories

"_Where am I?" I looked around me, it looked like…nothing. Nothing but black surrounded me. I looked down at myself, my left arm pulsing with great pain. I clutched it, trying to apply pressure to numb the fire inside my arm. The pain only grew, I collapsed and screamed. For surely my arm was either going to melt or burst into flames?_

_I rolled back the sleeve of my tee shirt, my eyes widening as I saw what looked like scratches and cuts forming on my arm. _

_From the inside?_

_Is it drawing or spelling something? What is going on?_

17 January 2004

_Every letter carved…every number…_

_I stared at the fresh wounds on arm, "Why this date? What happened here--?" _

_BOOM_

_Like a thunderclap, I felt another presence in the complete blackness, not darkness, blackness. It was as if a red light was on, like in a photography room._

_The pain dying down in my arm, I crawled around in my crouch, looking in every possible direction for someone, something. _

"_!!!" An audible gasp passed my mouth as I felt the pressure of a hand being placed on my shoulder; I whipped around to look at the presence._

"_Lawliet?"_

_The person in front of me's eyes widened, revealing their crimson color. _

_Was it…me?_

_The mirror image only smiled, a sick, twisted smile and he pushed me to the black ground._

"_AHYA..HYAHAHA…NO. NO, NO, NOT LAWLI-POP! IT'S B!" He pushed my head hard onto the cold, black ground, pulling my hair, his mouth near my ear. "I'm you…"_

_His crazy, tangled black hair smothered my face as I stared off into the blackness._

"_You're me?"_

_The clone continued to press his body weight onto me, "Yes, I am your…conscience per say." He pushed himself up and looked down at me, "Your crazy, crazy conscience."_

"_Okay then…" I studied his demented face and shivered, "…tell me, where am I?"_

_He fell down next to me, laying staring off into the abyss, a hand twirling his tangled hair. He lay there for another moment then sprang up, hold out a hand. _

"_Well…get up!" _

_I sat up, demanding answers "Are you going to tell me anything? Where are we?" _

"_Beyond Birthday", he said in an intensified voice, "I need to show you a memory."_

"_Wha—" _

_He grabbed my scratched arm and pushed it through his chest…his heart. _

"_H-hey, what are you doing?!"_

_What was this act of insanity? His eyes were rolling to the back of his head while blood leaked from the corners of his eyes, and the now gaping hole in his chest stained the rest of his body with blood. But he persisted and pushed my arm even further, I clenched my eyelids shut as I tried to protest away from him…_

_CLICK_

_I flicked my eyes open, and shut then almost instantly, not yet used to the brightness that juxtaposed with the former darkness. I looked as if I were…_

_I looked around at the eerily familiar room, eerie because it had been so long…_

_SLAM_

"_Lawliet…? What are you doing here?" _

_Lawliet, who was facing the door, slowly turned around, eyes never meeting Asher's face, responded quietly, "B-beyond told me to come here."_

_Clearly, though I was in the room, I was not really in the room. I passed through everything I tried to grasp, and they would not respond to my shouts. No, I was just an observer._

"_Well I inferred that much…but where is your brother?" He took a step towards L._

_Lawliet guardedly backed into the nearest corner of the room, his face showing fear._

_Why does Lawli look so frightened?_

"_Do you think he will be stopping by today?" His eye brow raised, his smile resembled a parabola, perfect, but complex. _

_Asher continued to stalk forward. _

_Lawliet turned his head to face the opposite wall, almost as if he were staring straight at me, "Well…A-Asher…I'm not so sure…He seemed like he would be busy all day…"_

_Asher leaned on the wall next to Lawliet, folding his arms, "Oh, really; it will just be you and me?" _

_Lawliet pressed his body as close to the corner of the small dormitory as he could. _

_His expression…all too familiar…_

_As I watched Lawliet sink into the corner even further, my throat started to close up, my heart beat pounding in my ears, I opened my mouth, a scream trying to escape but nothing but silence escaped._

_My head was spinning a mile a minute, I felt constricted as I watched Lawliet, my poor, helpless Lawliet…_

_He was so innocent, and pure. Why must things like this happen to the weak or defenseless; the young or the impressionable? He was a beautiful person, intelligent, and talented at anything he pursued. But I know that no one will ever see it because…ever since he can remember, Lawliet was broken._

_Can one person take so much abuse? From his parents, the two people in the world who are supposed to love you unconditionally, and protect you from every evil?_

_And now…now I see…_

_How stupid I have been…he tried to tell me! And…I just dismissed him and egged him on to go…go to his second hell. _

_I was tormented by the sight before me, so distraught; I could not even produce tears. _

"_Don't shout Lawliet, we wouldn't want my classmates to hear…" He entwined his large hand into Lawliet's tangled black hair and forced him up. His eyes danced across Lawliet's tear stained face, darting back and forth between his terrified eyes. "Why are you frightened?" he tilted his head, shaggy blond hair shifting slightly, "…you know the routine."_

_Lawliet bowed his head in defeat and held out his arms in front, resembling a zombie, "Do with me what you want Asher Ticket."_

"_Do with you as I want, huh?" He reached out a long arm and pushed Lawliet's chin up, forcing him to look into his vile eyes. _

_Lawliet's tired, blood shot eyes tried to look away, anywhere but at the man standing before him. Asher scrunched his eyes brows in annoyance and shook Lawliet's jaw, demanding eye contact._

"_I would like a response Lawli-lamb."_

_My head looked back and forth, back and forth, at the two conflicted men in the room._

_Lawli-lamb? __**No one**__ makes nicknames for Lawliet, unless that person is __**me**__._

_I could sense the hackneyed undertone in Lawliet's voice as he said, "You may do whatever pleases you most Asher Ticket." It sounded so rehearsed. Clearly this was not their first…encounter. _

_As I continued to observe the scene, I was constantly trying to grab one of them, but it was useless._

_The man I loved…is destroying, no destroyed my brother._

_And I…_

_How could I…not see this? How blinded was I by Asher's illusion? He made me believe…that he cared. And for what; to abuse or torture my other half? _

_My eyes were locked on the small bed, as I stared off into space. My head was pounding with confusion, pain, and hatred._

"_BEYOND!!!!!" _

_My head snapped up to my brother, who was being pinned down, onto the floor._

"_B!!! HELP ME! ANY—"_

_Asher smacked, no punched Lawliet's jaw, and intensely articulated, "Scream one more time…and you will never see your ignorant brother again. After all…that was our deal right? You do this for me, and I'll give your stupid brother a smidgen of hope that someone may actually care about him." He swiped something underneath the bed and held it over Lawliet's face, dangling it in a mocking manner. _

_Would he tie that around Lawliet's mouth to suppress his screams? _

_Sure enough he swiftly tied it around the defenseless teenager's head, and laughed as he saw Lawliet's silent tears fall down his face._

"_BEEEEEYOND"_

_Something was happening. I felt like I was being sucked away from the room. I reached a hand out, trying to grasp my poor Lawliet, trying ever so hard to reach for him, but I was being pulled far away from him, like a vacuum. _

"_BEEEEEE…."_

"_L-Lawliet…" I whispered out as I tried with all of my strength to reach to him, my volume not quite matching the energy within me, but ultimately my efforts were useless._

"_B! B! B!"_

"_LAWLIET!" I yelled gaining volume and intensity, and for a moment I could almost swear that I saw Lawliet look at me and mouth, 'I'm sorry'._

"Beyond! Wake up!"

I shuddered and frantically glanced around at my new location.

The warehouse? I…I was dreaming?

"Beyond? Are you okay?" He raised his eyebrows skeptically, "You were screaming…"

I ran my fingers through my thick, matted hair that was now coated with perspiration, "I…I…w-what happened?"

I did not like sounding this vulnerable, this frightened. I was supposed to be in control damn it.

"B…what happened? I knocked you out…but…and then you must have had a dream." His eyes danced around my face, I must have looked fresh out of an asylum. "Beyond, why were you screaming…my name?"


	16. I Dangle By A String

"Lawliet…" I continued to rock myself back and forth. My eyes stared off into space, avoiding the boy in front of me at all costs.

"I…You…" A coherent thought could not even form in my brain, none the less, a sentence pass my lips. My teeth chattered, as my jaw trembled. I would definitely not allow myself to cry in front of him.

He tilted his head, and for the first time in what felt like forever, I could see little streams of sunlight peering into the room. "Beyond? You can tell me…"

It almost looked as if Lawliet was comfortable here… but it has not even been twenty four hours…he should not have to get used to a disgusting place like this, not again.

I pressed my eyes lids shut as I inhaled deeply, contemplating the thoughts stirring in my head.

I got up and headed towards the stairs, after all I still had Alexandria up there. I pressed my weight on the first step, my head not even flinching at the sound of my name.

"Beyond…"

I continued to walk up the stairs, forcing myself not to look at him.

Things still had to go my way.

I was wanted for a kidnapping, who knows if someone ever reported that red head missing and, you can only be sick from work with pneumonia for so long.

It had been weeks…weeks since I even made contact with the outside world.

I was slipping…was I getting this sloppy?

I continued to the top of the stairs and walked towards Alexandria's chamber. I unlatched and unhooked the intricate locks, pushing the heavy door open.

Alexandria was fast asleep, curled up on her small, sad excuse for a bed, a blanket wrapped around her tightly.

I bent down towards her, pushing her hair out of her face, I spoke softly, and "Alexandria…" she shifted around, and gasped when she opened her eyes, blue eyes frantic.

"Oh…Oh, Akira…B-Beyond…W-what do you need? What did I do?"

Was I really that ruthless?

I tilted my head slightly, pausing a moment before speaking, "I was only wondering if you needed something; a shower or a bathroom visit? I know it has been a long…"

I remember the first time I planned to take her here…

"…time."

Her eyes danced across the room, clearly thinking of what to say. Even I realized that the question was a little left field. She sat up; the shirt she borrowed from Lawliet was stained with tears and perspiration, her long black hair falling past her shoulders.

"W-well…if it is not too much to ask…I would like a shower…" but immediately looked up to see my reaction, "…but I do not need to! Whatever you want Akira…"

I stood up and dug my hand into my pocket, I held a hand out toward her, "Come on."

"I-I…" she continued to look around, skeptic of my offer as she scratched her head, "…what?"

"I'll take you to the bathroom."

I pulled her up, realizing just how gaunt she really was.

_Maybe because she hasn't eaten in weeks…_

I escorted her to the small bathroom; shower, toilet, and all, just waiting to service her.

I pulled out a large, white cotton towel and showed her the soap and shampoo.

She still looked at me, confused, as she awkwardly struggled to grasp all of the items I handed to her.

"Why are you doing this?"

The simple question stated by her dug much deeper than I expected.

Why am I doing this? Any of this? I was nearing the edge of my sanity- contrary to those who believe that I have already lost. I could feel my state of mind dangling on a thin string over a black hole, and I knew… I just knew that one day I would fall into the blackness.

I snapped out of my miniature trance and gave Alexandria a half-hearted smile, turning the shower on for her, and then continuing out of the room. My hand shook as I struggled to steady it and lock the door behind me.

Falling into the blackness…it is a theory- no more of a theme per say, to my life. My life has been nothing but blackness.

_**Nothingness…**_

One day, the string holding me up would snap and I would fall to my doom. Fall into the everlasting darkness.

But am I scared?

**No.**

Ever since I can remember, I always knew that my life would not amount to much. And for a while, I tried to disprove that theory, I tried to do my best, and turn my life around.

Even now…I thought I was _doing_ something with my life. But this nagging feeling…this nagging feeling consuming my very thoughts…it spoke to me.

_The real Beyond Birthday inside of me is not a killer, not a rapist, and not an actor. _

I walked into my room and slammed the door shut, objects on the table shaking.

_But even if he is not all of those terrible things…he will die a terrible fate._

I stripped of my clothes and put new fresh ones on.

_He will never truly be happy…_

I pulled out another set of clothes, identical to mine and headed down the stairs.

…_he will die young._

But for now, I push these nagging thoughts away. Put them back into the depths of my head, hoping that they will disappear into their own darkness, but realizing that eventually they will return.

* * *

"Lawliet?" He was sitting on the floor, back leaning against the concrete wall, facing the eastern window where the sun light was pouring in. Lazily, his head turned toward me. "Why do you not show anger?"

He simply shrugged his shoulders, "Beyond…Of course I am angry, just look at my hand!" He raised his left arm that used to be in the hand cuff, displaying its new blood crusted look.

He really pried it out of that thing?

"Even so…Beyond…what good would it be to waste my energy on that anger? Did I mutilate my hand to pull it out of a handcuff? Yes, and because I needed to stop you from killing me. B, I am sure this isn't the first time someone has told you this but, you are a whole different kind of crazy."

I raised my chin, looking down on him, "You sound so sure."

"B…you carved your name into my chest. I would hardly call that conventional."

"I admit that my-", I glanced at his chest, "- methods may be a little different…"

I trailed off, so many thoughts clouding my mind that I could even finish my last sentence. I unhooked his right hand from the handcuff and pointed towards the clothes on the ground.

"What, is this for me?"

I nodded my head as he changed his clothes quickly, keeping his eyes in my direction.

_He still doesn't trust me…_

Lawliet zipped up the pants then promptly folded his arms across his chest defensively. "I am still curious as to what you were dreaming about last night. It seemed to upset you. Why don't you tell me about it?"

I turned my face away; I did not want to remember that awful dream…

Then it clicked, it was just a dream! How silly of me to take it so seriously!

"Well sure, I suppose I could tell you a little anyways. I mean you were in it."

I sat down on the bare concrete floor, Lawliet following suite, and took a deep breath.

_Just a dream…_

"Well…it was a dream of the past, I guess. Back when I was seeing Asher." I flicked up my eyes towards his, but they remained focused on the cold, hard floor. "You ran into his dormitory alone…" My body started to shake; I breathed trying to sooth my senses. _Just a dream…_ "And…Asher…h-he," I pressed my eye lids shut and continued, "…I mean, I d-didn't see it but I am not stupid…I knew what he was implying. Asher Ticket, was going to rape you." I bit my trembling lip, trying my hardest to suppress sobs. My throat started to close up, restricting my breath, "…b-but the weird thing was, Asher was speaking of some sort of deal. Like he would continue to see me if you…agreed…"

I needed to see his expression, crawled closer to him and pushed his face up. His eyes were wide, eyebrows twisted in confusion, nostrils flared with anger.

_But why? It was just a—_

"How…do you know all of that…?" Lawliet grabbed my shoulders, digging his fingers into my skin, his voice escalated, "HOW DO YOU KNOW!?"

He shook my body around, my brain pounding, "Lawliet! It was just a dream! Calm—"

Suddenly it felt as if I got punched in the gut, "…so it is true then?"

Lawliet released his grip, and I fell back onto the floor.

Standing up, I grabbed his arm and turned him towards me, "Lawliet?! It is true! But…h-how? When…how…w-why?"

"Beyond, I always did whatever I could to protect you and give you every happiness—"

"—At the expense of what!? Your sanity?!" My hands clenched my hair; I shook my head back and forth, "Lawliet! How could you do that? You should have told me!"

"How could I? It was the first time I saw you smile in months! Maybe years even!" I stumbled toward the kitchen counter, searching for support, my head continued to spin.

"Th-that is still not a good answer! How the hell does my happiness justify your actions?" It felt as if time were standing still, the energy in the room was all distorted and disorderly. "Lawliet…" I reached my peak. I crumbled down onto the floor, and broke out in screams.

"L! HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME?" Throwing my head back I wailed, "AH! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO YOURSELF?" I pounded my fists onto the floor as Lawliet remained standing, just watching. My chest was heaving, "LAWLIET! YOU- YOU LET ME LIVE A LIE! YOU HELPED HIM TRICK ME!" My head shot up towards him, tears staining my face, streaking down my cheeks. "HE NEVER LOVED ME AT ALL! YOU HELPED HIM HURT ME…" More sobs escaped my mouth; I started choking on my own saliva that started to thicken at the back of my throat. "And…" my tone declined back down to an appropriate level, "…by so doing…you hurt yourself…" My mahogany eyes looked up at him, "Where is the j-justice in that?"

Lawliet stared of lifelessly towards the small stairs case.

It was her…Alexandria who he was thinking of, not me. I knew I would soon have to retrieve her from the shower, but for now I needed to clear things up with Lawliet as best as I could.

"L-Lawliet…say something?"

His eyes remained covered by his crazy, onyx hair, but I could see the tiny drops of liquid hitting the floor below him.


	17. Yo quiero viver

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Drip, drip_

The tiny little drops fell from Lawliet's face, bursting on the floor.

The anger I had was pulsing throughout my veins; how could he do this to me?

Then, it hit me.

That is all it has ever been about.

Me.

I only thought about myself, even when I honestly did think I was helping Lawliet, I was only helping myself. I bit my lip, stunned at the idea. How opportunistic I have been… And here I am now, yelling at my brother, who had endured years of abuse…just for my happiness. Just to see me even crack a smile. I clenched my fists, wanting to punch myself, but instead turned my attention over to a frozen Lawliet.

The room was completely silent; the only noise was the tiny drops of Lawliet's tears.

"I was only trying to help…" my heart skipped a beat as he spoke, "…can you really hate me for that?" He slowly turned his head toward me, but still avoided full eye contact, "I would suffer every moment of everyday if that guaranteed a moment of happiness for you." He tried to smile, but his face looked so weak. The crying, no matter how soft, seemed to have really taken the energy from him.

I wanted to run up to him and hold him, hold my baby brother. Because I loved him, I always have; sometimes more than I should by conventional standards, but I loved him. And finally seeing him now, after all of these years…I didn't want to look away for a second, scared that he may disappear.

I watched his chest rise and fall with each breath, he seemed to be shaking only slightly, but still it worried me.

I took a deep breath of my own and spoke softly, "I am so sorry Lawliet." I tilted my head and looked up at him, trying to get eye contact, "I never meant to yell. I was just…" I paused and licked my dry, cracked lips, "…just surprised…"

Lawliet nodded, small and reserved; opened his mouth to speak but coughed harshly instead.

My eyes wandered off and looked around the room when I realized, 'Alexandria is still up there…'

I flickered my eyes up toward Lawliet, "L, would you like to come and get Alexandria with me?"

He stared at me in disbelief, "Are…are you sure?"

I nodded my head, and motioned my arm, suggesting he go in front of me.

We walked up the stairs slowly; I could see Lawliet taking in every detail.

"This is your first time up here?"

He nodded curtly and continued up.

------

_Knock, knock_

"Alexandria?" I did not hear the water from the shower running, she must be finished. Cautiously, I opened the door.

"Akira?" she was leaning against the wall and leapt up, "Uh, I was just waiting for you to get me…"

As I walked in, she backed up, "I-I'm really grateful for this…thank you." A corner of her mouth actually threatened to smile.

Her expression totally transformed when she saw Lawliet walk into the room. Her eyes quickly filled with hot tears as he hugged her. It really was a beautiful thing…

Lawliet was happy, and had a good life without me.

Accidentally thinking out loud "Seems like you've never needed me after all…" I swallowed, trying to breath around the lump in my throat, "I've always needed you…not the other way around…"

He immediately cut in, breaking his embrace with Alexandria, "That is not true Beyond Birthday. Ever since we parted ways, I had always been looking for you." He chuckled a little and shook his head, "I just never thought Alexandria would be the one to find you."

My eyebrows scrunched up as my face turned towards the petite girl, "Alexandria?"

Lawliet spoke for her, "Yes. She had come home one day telling me all about a boy in her class that looked exactly like me. She even described your large red eyes. I knew it was you! You have such unique features, it had to be. But when she told me your name, 'Akira Javed', I was curious as to why you had changed your name, so I told her to pay attention to you. Talk to you if she could, I wanted her to get close to you so in turn I could one day reunite with you."

I was completely confounded. It seems like I was not the only mastermind in this room after all.

"When you abducted her, I didn't know what to expect. But something told me not to tell the police, I knew I could do this on my own." He looked at me, directly into my crimson eyes, "Beyond, you're more amazing than I have ever expected." He raised his eyebrows, "Minus the murder of course…but besides that, B, you are truly exquisite." He stepped towards me, "I am proud to be your brother."

He was only a few inches from me; I could see every contour of his face, when I noticed it. He had purple, bruise-like circles around his tired eyes. And maybe that was just it, maybe he was just tired.

Even so, it made him look sickly, and his gaunt frame didn't help either.

"W-why don't we take this into my bedroom?"

----

The two victims followed suite into my bedroom and waited for further direction.

"You may sit down in the bed, if you'd like."

Alexandria glanced up at Lawliet, and followed his action, carefully sitting on the fluffy bed.

I paced back and forth, circling the room many times, when Alexandria spoke.

"Akira, what is bothering you?"

I disregarded her and looked directly at Lawliet. "I just do not understand. Why did you try so hard to find me? I was never that good to you!"

Alexandria put a hand on Lawliet's back as he pressed his eyes lids shut and inhaled deeply.

"Why do you still not try to run?" My nostrils flared, as my temperature rose, I wanted to know.

"Because Beyond, I needed to tell you something…I need to tell you something."

My head moved forward, waiting for his answer.

He took another painfully slow breath and said, "Beyond, I'm dying."

------

**Author's Note: Yay! My first A/N, and I realize it is a little…delayed. Sorry! I just wanted to say, sorry for not updating sooner but I have been super, super busy! I have already mapped out the rest of the story in my mind and I can't wait to see what you have to say about it! Now, if only I could get more people to read & review…**

**-Love, Majda**


	18. Nature's Best Medicine

Lawliet is dying?

I mean…everyone dies…there is no dodging that, but does he mean to tell me that he is going to soon? I just found him…

We just reunited…this must be a joke.

"Lawliet?" I muttered out shakily.

It was only when he placed his hands on my shoulders that I realized I was hunched over on the floor. A thick coat of sweat caused my clothes to cling to my skin, suffocating me even further.

_He is my brother…_

_Yeah, but you did kill his parents...that really hurt him_

_But…they were hurting us! I put an end to it!_

_What about Asher?_

_Gah! Shut up! Shut up!_

_You were blinded by Asher's façade and in turn you hurt Lawliet even more._

_I didn't mean to!_

_Well now he's dying…_

_I know…I know…_

_So fix him__._

_What?_

_Fix him._

_What does the fuck does that mean?_

"Beyond?" He looked at me quizzically, wondering where my mind was I suppose.

"I…I…" I stuttered lamely and looked between Alexandria and himself. "I am…so sorry for everything I did to you…" I looked specifically at Alexandria, "…especially you."

_What the hell is happening to me? I am apologizing? _

_I am actually feeling remorse? _

_No…It can't be._

"Beyond…I know that's a lot to handle but…I mean, went through all of this trouble to find you…just to tell you."  
I could really notice it now, his just sickly looking physique. The bags under his eyes were a different skin pigment completely, the rest of his body a little yellow, and even his hair had lost all of its sheen and life.

I could see Lawliet stiffen as his voice grew a little deeper, and a little louder with authority, "But now…Now Alexandria and I must go." He paused and then continued, "I'm sorry to have to leave so soon but…this whole journey to find you took longer than I anticipated."

When he looked down at me, I could see his eyes glossed over with tears, "I'm sorry but it's time for us to part ways."

_Wait, what?_

"Kya..haha..hahah…"

Lawliet turned around and looked at me as his brows knitted together.

"KYAHAHAHA!" I pulled at my hair and threw my head back. "KYAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Quickly, I stood up and pointed a long finger towards him, "YA THINK YOU CAN JUST…LEAVE!?"

Lawliet tilted his head; _did he not see the humor in this?_

"KYHAHAHA! YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!!"

He stood in front of Alexandria protectively as I stalked forward.

I lowered my lids and took a deep breath, "Oh Lawliet…you're too funny. That's a cute idea you had there…you know, about leaving and everything?" I paced back and forth in front of him, "There is only one little detail about that plan that you'd have to change."

He raised an eyebrow, "And that it?"

I couldn't contain myself, once again, fits of laughter escaping my mouth, "KYAHA! Lawli…you sure as hell aren't leaving!"

I turned away, looking back at the door when –

**CRUNCH**

My world went **black.**

**Author's Note: **So…I feel like, just about the meanest person in the PLANET! Well that's a bit dramatic, eh? Well, I basically want to say sorry for the horribly long wait! I really have no excuse for it besides being an awful person!!! Well…I mean I also have a life but SERIOUS, this wait was ridiculous. Well, I know how this story is going to end! Ah!! Both happy and sad about that, I think I will have about two chapters left…again sad. I realize this chap is also lacking a bit of substance but although it is terribly short, it is leading up to the climax and longest chapter I have ever written sooooo…I think that's fair enough! **Read and Review!**

Love

-**M**


	19. It's Raining, It's Pouring

_Drip drip drip._

_Drip drip._

_Drip…_

_Wh-what the hell?_

My eyes fluttered open, first at the unusual sound surrounding me.

_Where the fuck am I?_

It was then that I felt the harsh drops of rain falling full speed onto my back, my face pressed into the concrete. It was black as pitch out, only the crescent moon illuminating the Earth below. A shiver ran down my spine as the wind blew.

_Come on, get up, you need to find out where you are._

_Yeah…wait where are my clothes?!_

I looked down at my pale scarred chest, I was devoid of most of my clothing that I had been wearing, I only had on a soaked pair of old ripped jeans.

_Well this is just fucking perfect, I was just about to tell Lawli—_

_SHIT! Where the FUCK is he!? _

My eyes jumped around in panic as I jumped up onto my feet, wobbling for a moment, when I realized that I was on the roof of my own warehouse.

_What the hell did they do to me…and better yet, where the fuck did they go?_

I clenched my fists as the pellets of rain continued to pelt my skin, there was no doubt that I was going to be sick. I had no idea how long I had been up there in the rain, nor had I any idea how I got up there or what happened to them.

After collecting some coherent and rational thoughts I ran to the trap door and jumped down into the cellar.

_Thud._

The silence was so pure, the only ambient noise was the rain, and it made the silence of the room almost eerie.

I carefully walked across the wobbly floor boards and made my way to the stairs.

_First things first, I must find those two._

Once down the stairs that connected to my room I turned around and stared in horror.

Everything…_everything_...was burned.

All of it…was gone. I didn't know whether to feel upset or furious. I was void of all emotion at this point. I stared at the piles of ash as my skin grew hot. I wiped at my face, hot droplets mixing with cold ones as I made my way down another flight of stairs to find the rest of my beloved warehouse burned. The concrete structure was the only thing that remained. Lawliet must have known about the fire walls…he knew that everything but the walls would burn…he never intended to kill me.

_He may as well have…this place was my whole life…_

A constant stream if tears flowed out of the corners of my eyes in a slow, solemn pattern.

The ashes…the ashes…were _everywhere. _Black specs covering my once holy temple. I reached out towards the wall, the black dust staining the tips of my fingers. My nostrils flared as I rubbed the ash between my fingers, I wanted to know…why. Why the hell would he do this? Tell me all of these things, tell me that he is _dying_, then…then fucking leave?!

He came all this way to save his precious fucking girlfriend, I bet that's it.

Fucking women, they mess everything up! I shouldn't even kill them anymore; it's too much God damn trouble, just another pain in my ass.

It still was unclear as to what had happened to me, and I was still very unsure as to exactly how much time had passed.

_Oh shit…_

I sprinted towards the garage to find to large door very much open with the wind howling around it.

_The fucking car is gone…_

I ran towards they empty space and saw tiny drips of gasoline on the ground.

_I bet they considered burning this room too…_

Those fuckers.

CRASH.

I jumped as the lightening struck showing my shadow on the wall and the thunder howled, shaking the walls. It was only when the lightening illuminated the room for that brief moment when I saw the shiny square on the floor.

_My mobile phone?_

I picked it up delicately and pressed the keys.

1 New Message

I clicked it open and read.

"_Beyond, by the time you read this Alexandria and I will be crossing state lines. Do not come looking for us and we will not go looking for you. I have not called the police but if you come after us do not put the action past me. I'm sorry to have to pick up and leave- nice car by the way, very clean- but I couldn't go through with it."_

I looked away from the bright screen for a brief moment and rubbed my eyes. _That fucking asshole…Go through with what?_

My question was soon answered when I looked back as the screen.

"_B, the whole reason I came to find you…everything was…Well, I needed something from you. Something I could get from only you. And I am truly sorry for what I'm about to confess. Just remember, if you come after me, I will call the authorities as I have every right to do so." _

I swallowed hard and moved the small phone closer to my eyes.

"_I was going to harvest your organs. Beyond, I needed them. I needed them for my operation, without them I am going to die. But I…I couldn't go through with it…as you very well can see, when you awoke on the roof there were no new scars on your chest. I'm such a fucking baby. I couldn't do it…because I'd rather die. B, I was going to hurt you…and I realized all my actions so far, up to this very day…I just…God how I have made you hurt." _

My heart completely sank at his words but I wiped my eyes with the black side of my hand and read on.

"_All the pain I have caused you…to think I was really going to steal your life just so I could live longer. Alexandria is pissed at me, she said she would do it herself but I didn't let her. Beyond…Beyond Birthday…forget me. Let me fade, these past few days with me, weeks with Alexandria, let it fade. Let it diminish into nothingness and move on. Rumor has it, you're pretty successful at your job in the tech firm. Please, just do something with it share your good talent with the world. Don't continue this mindless slaughter that you're so eager, too eager to perform. You're not a monster. B, I wish you every happiness. In my heart, I know you'll hate me for all of these requests but if it secures your life and potential chance at normal life, then so be it. The pros out way the cons in this situation, so just let it happen."_

My jaw locked and my eyebrows furrowed, _this can't be happening._

"_And B? I hope you know that I've always loved you, my twin brother. I love you."_

_END OF MESSAGE 17 DEC 00:46_

_00:46?_

I glanced down at my wrist watch.

00:59

My eyes widened, I must have woken up faster than he had anticipated! I still had time, time to catch him!

I sprinted towards the door and bent down towards the bucket of shoes and slipped on an appropriate pair.

_I still have time…_

I knew all of the roads around here; I knew there was only one way to the interstate. I pulled on a thin gray hoodie I found in the bin behind the boiler and melted in its warmth. I felt revived and tucked the phone into my pant pocket and began my sprint out of the large door. I still wasn't entirely what my plan was; my only goal was finding him. What I was going to do after, I was not entirely sure. I just needed to get some real damn answers.


	20. If I Should Die Before I Wake

As I sprinted with all of my might, the rain drilled into my skin as if trying to push me back. But I knew I could make it. I knew that if I pushed myself hard enough I would reach them. My bare feet tore up the muddy ground beneath it, constantly soaked in the puddles. I my arms pumped at my sides as I continued to sprint. All of my energy focused on the ultimate goal: to get Lawliet.

And do what when I find him?

That, I was still not entirely sure...

CRASH

The lightning struck, lighting up the barren wasteland around me. The tall trees' leaves blowing furiously in the wind. The rain, now sideways, smacking me in the face; it was as if even Mother Nature was trying to hold me back. That was all people did. All anyone ever did for me. Everyone I came into contact with was my own personal roadblock. Well it was about damn time that Beyond Birthday got what he wanted without any strings attached.

I paused for a moment and leaned my hand on a tree, hunching over to catch my breath.

_What if I don't find them? What the hell am I going to do then?_

_Do you hear yourself? I swear you're going soft on me! So, grow a pair and make sure they don't get away!_

I knew my inner conscience was right. I had to just do something about it and stop complaining. I walked toward the road and started running alongside the traffic, which was almost none existent save for a few cars and trucks.

I kept running, and running, I was like a Goddamn Forrest Gump on crack.

In reality only a few minutes were passing but in my mind, it felt as if a century had passed with each second. My vision had been set into slow motion, every move was slow yet a blur at the same time.

A contradiction…

…story of my life.

If possible, the rain stormed down with even more force, making the puddles on the side of the road even larger and making it hell of a lot harder for me to see.

But oddly enough, that's when I saw it.

_Th-there! There it is! I fucking see it!_

There before me was my own silver car towards me. After all, everyone knows that you run towards the traffic so they can see you, hell even _I _know that.

I knew that even if a waved my hands in the air like an idiot they most likely wouldn't be able to see me.

But I didn't know what else to do. I waved and waved, and started moving towards the edge of the road as I yelled.

"Lawliet! Lawli! Fuck." I pushed my hair out of my eyes, "LAWLIET! STOP!" I was still a good 100 feet in front of him, but I hoped that with the high beams on he could see me. But that's like asking someone the find a needle in a haystack.

I wanted to run onto the street and stand right in front of him but I knew the risk in that, not only might L hit me, but the other traffic might. The seconds crawled on, passing so slow.

_I swear, I fucking swear, I didn't make it all this way just to wave him off and leave._

_L Lawliet—_

CRASH

I'm alone…

_W-where the hell am I? Did I get struck by lightning? _

Once again, my mirror image, my conscience walked in front of me. It was only then that I realized I was crouched down in the endless black room.

_They're calling for you, you know? _

_Calling for me?_

_Yeah…I'll never understand their attachment to you either._

_B-but…I mean. What is going on?_

The clone looked away into the dark abyss, his face grim.

_I suppose all of your questions will be answered once you wake up._

I opened my mouth to speak again, and could have sworn I saw tears glaze over his red eyes when everything zoomed away in a blur.

I could see people standing around me; a bright light was shining in my face as people called my name.

_Who the hell are these people?_

A young blonde-haired woman was the first to speak, "H-hey! You guys! He's awake!" She looked behind her shoulder, "He's awake!"

"Sir, My name is Michelle Harman, I'm an EMT. Do you know where you are?"

I tried to open my mouth, but nothing happened I couldn't move. I just slowly turned my head from side to side. I couldn't feel anything.

I couldn't even feel pain.

She turned to another EMT and whispered something to him. He looked at me with sad eyes and walked out of the crowd.

That's when I felt it; I could still feel the rain hitting my skin, only now…it was gentle.

I opened my mouth to speak again, when I noticed the slow stream of blood dripping down the corner of my mouth.

That's when it fully set in.

_Fuck! I need to see where I am!_

I looked down and almost screamed at the sight before me.

Never in a million years would I have thought that I was to die like this.

In front of me was a car…entangled with myself?

_No…no, no, NO!_

_When the fuck did this happen!_

My right arm was completely limp, and I struggled to lift my left arm. I groped at my shirt, or what was left of it. I reached for my hair. My dirty, greasy hair had a new ingredient now. It was saturated with my own blood. I felt a foreign object behind myself. It was hard and rough but I still couldn't identify it. My mouth was coated with thick saliva as I licked my lips.

The young nurse who had been scribbling down notes on paper work under an umbrella looked up and did her best to smile.

"Hun, everything is going to be fine. I just sent Mike out to retrieve your brother." She must have seen my face light up at those words, "See? So you just hold 'til he gets here okay sweetie?"

I could hear her voice break as she called me the childish pet name. She had to turn away from me.

Was I really going to die here and now? And why haven't they moved the car out in front of me? I could still probably get out!

"B-beyond?"

I looked up at Lawliet with all of my strength. It was just Lawliet, no Alexandria, just him. The EMT Michelle looked up at us and smiled, whispered something to Lawliet and turned back to me, speaking slowly, "I'll give you two a few moments alone. Just holler if you need anything, I'll be back soon."

I didn't know what to say to Lawliet.

And Lawliet stood there motionless with tears welled up in his eyes, threatening to spill over.

"B-b…"

He bent closer to me, and stroked my cheek with the back of his palm.

"Brother…"

I had to speak to him, I had to.

"Lawliet…" my voice really had sounded weaker than I had anticipated. "L…what's going to happen?"

He looked away as tears continued down his face in a constant stream.

"W-well, we're going to take you to the hospital, and get you fixed…and…"

"No L…" I raised my left hand slowly and gripped his soaked shirt, "…the truth."

I could see L contemplating what to do as he stared at me.

"Well…I'm not much of a liar so, B, I'll just tell you the facts."

_Clunk, clunk._

He hit the car, "This car in front of you? Is the only thing holding you together right now." He voice was breaking with each word.

My eyes went wild as I looked around frantically, "B-but this isn't my car! It…it w-wasn't you?"

Lawliet shook his head as he looked down at me, "No B. The young woman driving this car hydroplaned and accidentally hit you." He continued to shake his head, "I don't know how to feel B…I know you're going to die but…"

"L? You know…this is good."

"Good? How the hell is this good!" his voice was raising with excitement.

"N-now…" I had to breath carefully, "…you can get that operation…"

He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows, "B…Beyond…that was the last thing on my mind."

"Guess the world just wasn't big enough for the two of us." I chuckled a little, trying to keep my eyes open.

Oh how they so badly wanted to close.

"S-so L, w-who was it that…you know…"

His eyes flicked towards mine, "Madeline." He paused and took a cautious breath, "Madeline Scott, a seventeen year old."

That name…was so…_familiar._

"B…you killed her sister. You may not remember, but you did."

_Ah, fuck, the Scott girl._

"And s-she claimed this was an accident?"

"B, how could she have known it was you?" L stuck a hand in his hair and scratched his head. "B, I just…I just want to tell you. I just want to tell how you how much I love you. My twin brother, you always have understood me more than anyone, even if it didn't appear that way at times." He paused and cleared his throat. "I…I d-don't know what I'm going to do without you."

He bent down to whisper in my ear; he held my hand as he said, "Beyond…forgive me for any wrong I have done to you, no really listen." He shushed my protest, "Just listen. I could never have asked for a better brother. You always protected me; you always cared about me even when I pushed you away. And for that, I can give you all of my love." He chuckled softly, "You know, B? Sometimes I want to hurt you and sometimes I want to hold you."

I didn't even notice the hot tears streaming down my own face.

"So just let me hold you here." His breathing was shaky. "J-just let me hold you a little while."

He held my held close to his chest. I felt so secure, so safe. I knew that my brother loved me, and I loved him.

I tapped his back with my left arm, and used the last of my energy to smile up at him.

Now I knew.

I knew that I could close my eyes and rest.

Forever and **Beyond**.

A/N: ….woah…This is really it…

Beyond and L's story has come to an end. So please share your thoughts, if ya hate it? Tell me. If ya love it? Tell me! I always knew it was going to end like this. I teared up a lot writing this last chapter, so I hope I wrote it with justice. I was thinking about writing an epilogue, but, really it is up to you guys. Leave me questions about anything that remains unclear and I'll respond as quickly as possible. Thank you to everyone that has been reading!

-M


End file.
